Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extend do you agree or disagree with this notion.

Some

people

opine that

music

is an excellent source which helps to fetch human beings, who belong to other traditions and duration. I strongly agree with

this

perspective.

This

essay will elaborate on opinions in the upcoming paragraphs. To commence with, individuals easily get attracted towards other rituals with the help of melody. Every religions have its own ancient

music

therefore

people

from different community are always eager to know more about the source of the sound.

For instance

, foreign visitors are very popular in India, the reason behind

that is

Indian

music

which is world widely famous.

Thus

, distances between humanity are getting faded

day

Moreover

, musical concerts are very famous nowadays.

People

spend a handsome amount to attend those events.

For example

, a musical night that was recently conducted in Brampton by Punjabi singers was legendary. Thousands of

people

who hail from other cultures wore punjabi traditional dresses to attend the ceremony.

Hence

, it is proved that citizens follow

music

from the depth of their hearts.

On the other hand

, the new generation forgets their traditional values and follows others as per their taste of the

music

. Stability is becoming down

day

. They should focus on their culture

along with

their affectionate things. To summarise, Some drawbacks can force us to think about

this

tradition. But

this

change is necessary for every individual.

Submitted by harpreet291kaur on Fri Jul 21 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

229 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

5
band
Scientists and technology expert seem to be more valued by modern society than musicians and artists. To what extent do you agree?
Some nationalities tend to put more value on their scientists than their artists. However, I totally disagree with this because of the importance of arts in the mental health of a population and the influence of artistic works on one's scense of creativity.
4
band
Today, the high sales of popular consumer goods reflect the power of advertising and not real needs of the society in which they are sold. to what extent do you agree or disagree relevant examples from your own knowledge or experienece.
Nowadays, the population is being influenced, by massive reach of advertising through social media, and television or just walking around. Some people think that is creating need to consuming products, on the other hand, others believe that these products make life easier, therefore, there is a real reason to be sold. from my perspective it seems that marketing influencers in a great significant what to make desicions on the market.
4.5
band
A company has announced that it is wishes to build a large factory near your community. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of this new influence on your country. Do you support or oppose the factory? Explain your position.
Proclaimed has been done by a firm which is interested in constructing an industrial zone which is adjacent to the public society.Although one of the prime benefits behind this is that it provides employment and saves the time for employees, I believe that the drawbacks are overweigh of any advantages since it causes pollution and heavy congestion.
7.5
band
Some people say it is important to keep your home and your workplace tidy, with everthing organised and in the correct place. What is your opinion about this?
Many people believe that keeping their houses and workstations clean and in order is of extreme importance. I completely agree that having a tidy environment is important because it brings mental benefits to individuals and increases their productivity.
<4
band
Some people think it is more important to plant more trees in open areas in towns and cities than provide more housing. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Mix the nature and urbanism together is a great ideea. However, there are people to belive that instead of building houses is better to plant more trees. I strongly agree with planting more trees and combine crowded places with the nature.

Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extend do you agree or disagree with this notion.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Scientists and technology expert seem to be more valued by modern society than musicians and artists. To what extent do you agree?

Today, the high sales of popular consumer goods reflect the power of advertising and not real needs of the society in which they are sold. to what extent do you agree or disagree relevant examples from your own knowledge or experienece.

A company has announced that it is wishes to build a large factory near your community. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of this new influence on your country. Do you support or oppose the factory? Explain your position.

Some people say it is important to keep your home and your workplace tidy, with everthing organised and in the correct place. What is your opinion about this?

Some people think it is more important to plant more trees in open areas in towns and cities than provide more housing. To what extent do you agree or disagree?