In many societies in the world, the population is ageing rapidly and this is leading to an unsustainable increase in the cost of public healthcare.

#societies #world #population #cost #healthcare

One of the main themes today is about supporting old

people

Change preposition

with

show examples

health care services.Now our society thinks

how

Change preposition

about how

show examples

government

Correct article usage

the government

show examples

can ensure elderly men and women

Fix the infinitive

apply

show examples

care

their

Change preposition

for their

show examples

health, but their number increases every day and

this

task becomes harder

respectively

Rephrase

apply

show examples

.As I think, it is mentioned

Change preposition

show examples

the general standard of living.We will be able to give treatment to everyone

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

medicine

becomes more accessible for all groups of society.So, it can be difficult to make their life easier after ten years at least.

Firstly

it is clear that

medicine

isn'

free.In our

country

is costs very expensive.

Moreover

, retired old

people

can'

allow themself big spends of money, if they live alone.

For example

, in

Mangystau

Correct article usage

the Mangystau

show examples

region twenty

percent

Change the spelling

per cent

show examples

of all pensioners live in poverty because of low social security.Even the

insurence

Correct your spelling

insurance

can'

give

Correct pronoun usage

them a

show examples

chance to get

Remove the article

apply

show examples

good treatment.

Secondly

, it

is appears

Change the verb form

appears

show examples

to be true that

government

Correct article usage

the government

show examples

doesn'

try to develop the sector of

medicine

.It might be the result of massive corruption or something like that.

However

Change preposition

show examples

last

Correct article usage

the last

show examples

thirty

years

Add a comma

years,

show examples

there

weren'

Verb problem

haven't

show examples

made

Verb problem

been

show examples

any significant

changing

Fix the agreement mistake

changes

show examples

addings

Correct your spelling

additions

to reform

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

medicine

in our

country

.All we have now is the legacy, which was given by

country

soviets

Capitalize word

Soviets

show examples

.Wherever you go, you will see hospitals,

clinics

Correct word choice

and clinics

show examples

which were built in

Add an article

the socialistic

show examples

socialistic

Replace the word

socialist

show examples

era.We

didn'

Verb problem

haven't

show examples

make

Wrong verb form

made

show examples

any innovations since

taking

Verb problem

gaining

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

independence. In conclusion, taking all

mentioned

Correct article usage

the mentioned

show examples

arguments, facts and examples, we can say that our

country

needs very large changes, which can be made by large-scale reforms.Elderly

people

today aren'

protected by society

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

until we don'

start to look at all

people

equally and provide them with enough medical

equipments

Change the wording

equipment

types of equipment

pieces of equipment

show examples

, devices and other.

Submitted by dnm.best on Sat Jul 22 2023

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coherence cohesion

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Your opinion

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
34Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

274 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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In many societies in the world, the population is ageing rapidly and this is leading to an unsustainable increase in the cost of public healthcare.

Your opinion

6.Human activity has had a negative impact on plants and animals around the world. Some people think that this cannot be changed, while others think that actions can be taken to bring the change. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some say that music, art and drama are as important as other school subjects, especially at the primary level. Do you agree or disagree?

Lately, your company has informed you that you will be taking a lead role in an upcoming management project. Write a letter to a senior asking for guidance and request him/her to share his/her experience with you.

Some people think the government should pay health care and education, but others believe it is not the government’s responsibility. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people say that living in a high-rise apartment block is a lonely experience because there is no community spirit. Others say that people who live in high-rise apartments have a much better sense of community than those live in houses. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.