Some people think that governments should ban dangerous sports, while others think people should have freedom to do any sports or activity. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

#people #governments #ban #sports #freedom #activity

It is considered by

some

Capitalize word

Some

show examples

that those kinds of

sports

which could hurt

people

should not be allowed to take

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

place,

while

some may view

Correct your spelling

show examples

that

people

are free enough to choose any

sports

they prefer. In my opinion, I believe that adults could make their own decision about what kind of interest to choose and they are responsible for their decisions;

however

, dangerous kinds of sport could seriously damage society. On the one hand, it is scientifically proven that any kinds of physical

activities

Fix the agreement mistake

activity

show examples

release stress.

In other words

then

more activities are dynamic

then

more stress is released. Highly impulsive

people

, mostly males having high testosterone levels in

blood

Correct pronoun usage

their blood

show examples

could decrease the flash of violence only by doing extreme

sports

. In some particular cases jogging or yoga are not able to help.

This

is one of the reasons

Change preposition

for

show examples

being interested in dangerous activities.

As a result

, there are less domestic violence, office conflicts and toxic relationships.

On the other hand

, extreme

sports

could seriously harm young

people

. Usually, extreme

sports

are popular

between

Change preposition

among

show examples

teenagers as during that period

people

are seeking different new adventures

expressing

Correct word choice

and expressing

show examples

new emotions and positive feelings. Young

people

do not understand fully the responsibility for their lives and others. As an example,

such

platforms as Facebook, Instagram and Tik Tok

showing

Wrong verb form

show

show examples

various

Change preposition

apply

show examples

contents

Fix the agreement mistake

content

show examples

done by professionals.

However

, teenagers are not able to understand the difference between

experienced

Correct article usage

an experienced

show examples

and

usual

Correct article usage

a usual

show examples

person. They try to imitate performances and end up

Change preposition

apply

show examples

terribly injuring themselves. In conclusion, in my opinion, today we live in times of full freedom and are able to choose any hobby we are interested in.

Nevertheless

the

Correct word choice

if the

show examples

government does not ban dangerous

sport

Fix the agreement mistake

sports

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

society cannot handle the problem alone of teenagers’

reckless

Replace the word

recklessness

show examples

Submitted by s_syedy on Sat Jul 22 2023

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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9Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
18Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

294 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

severe injuries
fatalities
base jumping
bull running
extreme skiing
safeguard
well-being
regulating
avoidable harm
healthcare costs
burdening
personal freedom
autonomy
training
equipment
mitigated
personal satisfaction
mental health benefits
resilience
adventure
assess risks
public safety
unnecessary healthcare costs
outright bans
balanced approach
stringent safety standards
mandatory training sessions
adequately informed
safeguarding
public health

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