Crimes and other kinds of information on TV and newspaper have bad consequences. This kind of information should be restricted to be shown in the media. To what extent do you agree or disagree with the statement.

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In the ultra-modern epoch, crime has been inclining rapidly.
Although
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some
people
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believe that spreading awareness about crime through
media
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or
newspapers
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is not good and there should be a ban on
this
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, I partially
accord
Verb problem
agree
show examples
with
this
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scenario . My viewpoints will be explicated in the subsequent paragraphs. To commence with, there
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
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a wide array of reasons why
people
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reckon that illegal activities should not be
spread
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to the
country
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through some platforms. The most significant reason is that
media
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or
newspapers
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sometimes
spread
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fake
news
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through which the environment of the
country
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gets disturbed. The BBC
News
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for example
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, in 2019
spread
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the
news
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that a girl was rapped by two men, but after a few days, the truth was revealed that they were in a relationship and everything happened
according to
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the girl’s will.
Consequently
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, for a few days, the environment of the
country
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got
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was
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disturbed as
people
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wanted justice for the girl, but at
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last
Add a comma
last,
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the
news
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came
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turned
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out to be fake.
On the contrary
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, despite having the arguments there are a plethora of disagreements on
this
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phenomenon. The first and foremost is that some
people
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are connected to the world through
newspapers
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and if
newspapers
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will stop spreading the
news
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about crimes and other activities happening around, they will be surviving in complete darkness. My grandfather,
for instance
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, reads
newspapers
Use synonyms
daily through which he comes to know about the situations around him.
As a result
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, he comes to and makes me aware of these things and asks me to be cautious.
Therefore
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, if
news
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about the crime is not
spread
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through
newspapers
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it will be unfair to some
people
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. Another worth considering reason is that the
media
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also
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plays a pivotal role in spreading the
news
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about the selling and buying of drugs in some areas, through which parents can make sure their kids are not into these and can take strict actions. These reasons support why
media
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or
newspapers
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should not be stopped from spreading
such
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news
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.
To conclude
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, I would like to ingeminate that as it is believed that
media
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or
newspapers
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should put a haul on spreading the
news
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about crimes or other activities, I believe it will have more cons than pros. So, it is important for the
media
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to
spread
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about what is happening in the
country
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amongst the individuals of the
country
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by jaspreet on

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coherence cohesion
Make sure to maintain consistency in your arguments. You start by partially agreeing with the statement, but your body paragraphs seem to strongly lean towards one opinion. Clarify your stance in the conclusion to make it more consistent with the introduction.
task achievement
While providing examples, try to ensure they are relevant and accurately represent your point. For instance, the BBC News example could be discussed with more clarity regarding why such fake news is relevant to your argument.
task achievement
Enhance your range of vocabulary and check for grammatical accuracy. Some sentences are overly complex or contain minor grammatical inaccuracies. Simplifying these sentences could improve clarity.
coherence cohesion
Ensure smooth transitions between paragraphs to enhance flow. For instance, phrases like 'on the contrary' can be used more effectively to indicate a shift in argument.
coherence cohesion
The introduction and conclusion are present and capture the main idea of the essay.
task achievement
The essay is well-structured with clear main ideas and supporting points in each paragraph.
task achievement
The use of specific examples and explanations supports the main points, making the essay more convincing.

Word Count

IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.

A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.

Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • psychological impact
  • anxiety
  • fear
  • desensitization
  • sense of insecurity
  • sensationalize
  • viewership
  • readership
  • moral panic
  • unrealistic fear
  • copycat crimes
  • glorify
  • public awareness
  • community involvement
  • accountability
  • transparency
  • restriction
  • freedom of the press
  • democratic principle
  • well-informed citizens
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