Some people say that now is the best time in history to be Iiving. What is your opinion about this? What other time in history would be interesting to Iive in?

Over the past few decades, mankind has witnessed a rapid

development

technology

, and they have enjoyed more convenience than ever before. Some believe that it is the best time to live in history. I agree with the perspective. I think now is the perfect time in history since compared to previous times,

people

live healthy, affluent, convenient and fun lives. The

development

of medical

technology

has allowed doctors to detect patients' diseases early and treat their illnesses more quickly and effectively.

Accordingly

, individuals can live healthier and longer. The advance of farming

technology

has made fewer individuals suffer from a lack of food.

Moreover

, now

people

can enjoy more diverse leisure activities than in the past thanks to economic

development

and labour-saving devices. As information

technology

has improved,

people

can keep in touch with their family and friends more easily and frequently, using their electronic devices. I would be interested to live in my parents' generation. The reason is

people

live together in boarding houses compared to the present, so I might get a more special experience.

However

, nowadays, we live in a competitive society so we do not have much time

along with

someone.

In addition

, there were lots of historical things

such

as music, clothes, food and buildings, so I want to learn about monuments in person.

Besides

, I am interested in old fashion and make-up, so I want to learn about it. In conclusion, humanity has experienced many changes and individuals witnessed the

development

of various technologies in their daily

life

Fix the agreement mistake

lives

show examples

. Advancing

technology

offers a variety of benefits to

people

. I think the world needs to develop for

people

life

Fix the agreement mistake

lives

show examples

and next-generation gradually.

Submitted by gnlwnww on Sun Jul 23 2023

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Coherence and Cohesion

The essay displays overall good coherence and cohesion. However, ensure a clearer link between ideas and use connecting words to improve the flow of the essay.

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

277 words

6.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Fossil fuel is the main source of energy. In some countries, the use of alternative sources of energy is encouraged. To what extent do you think it is a positive or negative development?

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