Now the machine is very complex, and a lot of difficulty work is automated. Do the benefits of machines are more than drawbacks

It is undeniable that there has been great advancement in the usage of robots and machines which has brought ease in our lives.
Although
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
this
expansion has some repercussions, I believe that
advantages
Correct article usage
the advantages
show examples
certainly outweigh them. The primary benefit of automation is that it is proven beneficial to save precious human lives. There are
plethora
Add an article
a plethora
show examples
of dangerous industries
such
as mining, bomb disposal and sewage cleaning, where people were being coerced to work
due to
their financial conditions.
However
, we have an edge with machines as our involvement is no longer
requisited
Correct your spelling
required
in these risky places.
For instance
, In Japan, the cleaning of nuclear plants is conducted by robots.
Apart from
this
, higher productivity and efficiency
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
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also
enabled by reducing
labor
Change the spelling
labour
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costs and errors.
This
not only depicts
that
Correct determiner usage
the
show examples
benefits that employers are procured with, but
also
been
Add a missing verb
has been
show examples
proven advantageous to consumers because they can acquire cheaper products with high quality.
Additionally
, machines are used to perform monotonous duties like cleaning,washing and packing, which
further
provides us
ample
Change preposition
with ample
show examples
amount of Time to spend with family and friends.
On the other hand
, the replacement of workers in
work places
Correct your spelling
workplaces
show examples
is
lead
Replace the word
leads
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to unemployment.
Therefore
, it has created
an
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
enormous pressure on people which has caused a substantial increment in
suicide
Add an article
the suicide
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rate. A recent study,
for example
, is illustrating that the suicide rate has
been
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
increased by 12% since
last
year. To summarize, I would like to reiterate that
while
the dependence on automation has some consequences, the advantages are far more which cannot be neglected.
Submitted by amrin.sbk3 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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