Some say that music, art and drama are as important as other school subjects, especially at the primary level. Do you agree or disagree?
These days, people
belive
that music, art and drama Correct your spelling
believe
subjects
plays
a vital role in Change the verb form
play
children
deployment Change noun form
children's
especially
at Add the comma(s)
,especially
the
early Correct article usage
an
age
. I totally agree with that because this
help children to develop their talents
at early
Add an article
an early
age
and can increase their confidence.
Firstly
, these subjects
are as important as the other subjects
because it
develop Correct pronoun usage
they
childre's
talent at Correct your spelling
children's
very
tender Add an article
a very
age
. As they are young they can purse
anything and see in which field they wanna go and make it as a Correct your spelling
pursue
hobbie
or as a profession. They will probably not get any time in future as they will be busy to give exams and do the other needful things for their upcoming time and generation. Correct your spelling
hobby
For example
, most famous singers discovered their talents
at an early age
or rather say at school age
by their teachers or family members and they claimed they would be never successful if these people have not find
out their Change the verb form
found
talents
when they were young.
Moreover
, music, art, and drama subjects
help students to boost their confidence level
. Fix the agreement mistake
levels
That is
because these subjects
teaches
student, how to perform in front of lots of people and give them a chance to overcome their Change the verb form
teach
anxity
and Correct your spelling
anxiety
hestitation
. Correct your spelling
hesitation
As a result
, students can realise their potential and act more confidently. In a survey, many psychologists suggest to students that those who are fear to talk with others must join a dram class so that he/she may have enough confidence to have a word with any stranger without any hesitation.
In conclusion, this
essay completely agrees that music, art, and drama have the same value as other subjects
because it allows childre
to discover their hidden Correct your spelling
children
talents
and increase their self-confidence.Submitted by srivastav.anmol03 on
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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite