The top priority of bussiness is making money, and they do not need to have social responsibilities. To what extent do you agree or disagree

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It is
believing
Wrong verb form
believed
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that making
money
Use synonyms
is a
bussiness's
Correct your spelling
business's
top priority, but the social
Use synonyms
responbilities
Correct your spelling
responsibilities
is
also
Linking Words
unnecessary. It is true that making
money
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is the best promotion of the
business
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work so I completely agree about that opinion
Firstly
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, working or owning a
business
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is the way to get
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
reasonable economic resources, by the
way
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,way
show examples
money
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from
business
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completely
help
Correct subject-verb agreement
helps
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us change our life quickly. Some
investor
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investors
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got
the
Correct article usage
a
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luxury
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luxurious
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life from
run
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running
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a
business
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, they choose in
corporate
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the corporate
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market because
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business
Correct article usage
a business
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is
the
Correct article usage
a
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branch which
exemely
Correct your spelling
extremely
high
profit
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profits
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from trading, auctioning,
hunting
Correct word choice
and hunting
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in the international market. By all means, the
propose
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purpose
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of
businessman
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a businessman
the businessman
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is the subsequent economic profits. Once you go to the marketing fields you will accept that you have all or lose it all. If you want to generate profits, you can
also
Linking Words
take part in operating the company
Secondly
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,
but
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apply
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if you think that
money
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is the whole result of
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business
Add an article
the business
a business
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revolution, that's faulty. The very vital and significant aspect is public
Use synonyms
responbilities
Correct your spelling
responsibilities
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
also
Linking Words
need to be elaborated when the companies want to prioritize the face of the
business
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. It is not only the face of the firm
,
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apply
show examples
but
also
Linking Words
the condition for the general public to
acess
Correct your spelling
access
assess
the attitude of the existence of the corporation in the field.
Nevertheless
Linking Words
, the social
Use synonyms
responbilities
Correct your spelling
responsibilities
simply just that raise
fund
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funds
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for the
underpriveged
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underprivileged
or join the community
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activities
acitivities
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activities
, as a
conquence
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consequence
that is
Linking Words
not the main purpose but the important aim
the
Change preposition
of the
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firm towards to get
high
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a high
the high
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promotion In conclusion,
maximize
Wrong verb form
maximising
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profits to stem for
business
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but the social
Use synonyms
Correct your spelling
responsibilities
responbilities
Correct your spelling
responsibilities
are something which
lead
Change the verb form
leads
show examples
to the success of the corporation
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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • top priority
  • making money
  • social responsibilities
  • businesses
  • agree
  • counter argument
  • refutation
  • importance
  • personal opinion
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