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Band 6

In a number of countries, some people think it is necessary to spend large sums of money on constructing new railway lines for very fast trains between cities Others believe the money should be spent on improving existing public transport. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#countries #people #sums #money #railway #lines #trains #cities #transport
In a number of nations , some individuals feel it is significant to spend large
amonut
Correct your spelling
amount
amounts
of
money
 on building new
railway
 networks for extremely fast
trains
 between
cities
 Others think the
money
 should be spent on enhancing existing public
transport
. In my opinion, the
money
 should spend on
railway
 networks because
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
show examples
 connect
cities
 and it environmentally friendly. On the one hand, some think the government should spend
money
 on improving existing public
transport
.
This
 is because
improve
Wrong verb form
improving
show examples
 existing public
transport
 is cheaper than
build
Change the form of the verb
building
show examples
a new
Correct the article-noun agreement
a new railway line
new railway lines
show examples
railway
 lines.
Furthermore
,
improve
Wrong verb form
improving
show examples
 the existing public
transport
 can encourage
people
 to
use
 it rather than
use
 their private cars.
For example
, the government can make more improvements in order to make existing public
transport
 namely, buses, subway less crowded and faster, which
this
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
can motivate
people
 to
use
 it.
Therefore
,
this
 step can reduce the number of vehicles on our roads, which means less traffic congestion.
On the other hand
, I would like to agree with
thoses
Correct your spelling
those
people
 who believe the authorities should spend
this
money
 in order to construct
a new
Correct the article-noun agreement
new railway lines
a new railway line
show examples
railway
 lines.
To begin
 with,
construct
Wrong verb form
constructing
show examples
a new fast
Correct the article-noun agreement
a new fast train
new fast trains
show examples
trains
can
Correct pronoun usage
that can
show examples
 connect
cities
 can lead
reduce
Fix the infinitive
to reduce
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
commuting time for
people
 .
This
 is because fast
trains
 are faster,which
mean
Correct subject-verb agreement
means
show examples
people
 can arrive
to
Change preposition
at
show examples
 their destinations
with
Change preposition
in
show examples
 less time.
Moreover
,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
fast
trains
 are more eco-friendly. To illustrate,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
fast
trains
use
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
fuel in
efficient
Change the article
an efficient
show examples
 way than public
transport
, which
mean
Change the verb form
means
show examples
 less Co2 footprint.
As a result
 ,fast
trains
 can contribute to
mitigate
Change the verb form
mitigating
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
global warming and climate change
result
Wrong verb form
resulting
show examples
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
 less Co2 emissions.
To sum up
,
For
Change preposition
From
show examples
 my perspective, it is important to spend large sums of
money
 on constructing new
railway
 lines for very fast
trains
 between
cities
 because it can minimize travelling time for
people
as well as
 eco-friendly.
Submitted by faiz3177 on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • infrastructure
  • efficient
  • congestion
  • sustainable
  • environmentally friendly
  • connectivity
  • economic growth
  • public transportation
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