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Writing Samples
Band 7

The table below gives data on the hour of leisure time per year for people in someland.

The table below gives data on the hour of leisure time per year for people in someland.
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The table illustrates the information regarding how much leisure time individuals from different
age
Use synonyms
 groups spent yearly in Homeland.The data is calibrated in
hours
Use synonyms
.
Overall
Linking Words
,citizens in the
age
Use synonyms
 group of 70+ spend the maximum
hours
Use synonyms
 watching videos
whereas
Linking Words
 teenagers spend minimum
hours
Use synonyms
 in the cinema. At a fleeting glance, teenagers spend the maximum number of
hours
Use synonyms
 watching videos as compared to other
age
Use synonyms
 groups.The individuals belonging to 60 and 70+s spend similars
hours
Use synonyms
 in socialising with 4
people
Use synonyms
.
In addition
Linking Words
,citizens in their 30s spend double the time socialising with 4
people
Use synonyms
 in comparison to
people
Use synonyms
 belonging to the 20s who spend 150
hours
Use synonyms
.
Furthermore
Linking Words
,senior citizens do not prefer to spend any time doing group exercise and sports.They only spend 25
hours
Use synonyms
 socialising with 4
people
Use synonyms
.The teenagers spend the highest number of
hours
Use synonyms
 450
hours
Use synonyms
 on doing group exercise and sport
in contrast
Linking Words
 to other
age
Use synonyms
 groups.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the public in the50s utilised 50
hours
Use synonyms
 for individual exercise.

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Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words age, hours, people with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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