The charts below show the results of a survey of the primary exercise objectives and locations of a selected group of adults between 20 and 50 years of age.
The supplied pie charts illustrate the principal objectives of
people
divided below and upper 30 years
old. In general, it is clear that
the proportion of achievement at work plays a vital role in both groups.
To begin
with, people
under 30, spend most of their consideration on achievement at work which comprises about 31%, in comparison with people
over 30 who have 31% of their primary activities in this
regard. In addition
, doing hobbies is the second priority in both groups of
under and over Change preposition
apply
the
30 Correct article usage
apply
years
old which is 22 and 24 per cent, respectively.
On the other hand
, although
having a good appearance (18%) is the third priority in the group of
under 30, financial security is the third primary objective of Change preposition
apply
people
who have over the 30 years
old (20%). furthermore
, even though, people
over the
30 Correct article usage
apply
years
old tend to spend their time with their family, the other group like to go travelling (15%).Submitted by behnam.bakaeian on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words people, years with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
▼