IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

In recent years many countries have restricted where smoking is allowed. For example, smoking is often banned in restaurants. Some people believe that smoking should be allowed everywhere. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#years #countries #restaurants #people
Along with
 the growing of
the
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apply
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active smoker number in society, many countries have implemented
a
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apply
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strict
regulation
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regulations
show examples
 for
this
 case including where the permitting place
people
 could
smoke
. On the other side, some
people
 argue that smoking could be anywhere.
However
, I strongly disagree with
this
 point of view as I believe countries must regulate it to
being
Wrong verb form
be
show examples
 responsible individuals and maintain
a
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apply
show examples
public health. Nowadays,
people
 need space to refresh their minds. Smoking is one of the activities that some individuals engage in.
Due to
 the pressure of working life, especially in metropolitan
city
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cities
show examples
, some employees choose to socialize in café or
restaurant
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restaurants
show examples
 after work and they
also
smoke
. In my opinion, it is part of good awareness if we please
other
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others
show examples
 to
smoke
 anywhere they want.
Furthermore
, we do not need to care about other
people
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people's
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 business even if they fall
serious
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seriously
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 ill, we should not have to cover their medical expenses.
On the other hand
, many countries apply strict
regulation
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regulations
show examples
 for smoking
area
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areas
show examples
 and as
a
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apply
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responsible
citizen
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citizens
show examples
,
people
 must obey
it
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them
show examples
.
For example
, In Singapore, individuals face a fine
for
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of
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 around 10 dollars for smoking in prohibited places.
Whereas
 we can spend that money
to
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on
show examples
 other good things
such
 as helping poor
people
.
Additionally
, in some research, it is evident that passive
smoker
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smokers
show examples
 could suffer worse health
consequence
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consequences
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 than
an
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active
smoker
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smokers
show examples
.
Therefore
,
people
 need to
smoke
 where the place
allowed
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is allowed
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 to prevent and protect others. Smoking anywhere could provide certain
beneficial
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benefits
show examples
 for
individual
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individuals
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 who need
a
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apply
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enjoyment but it
also
 could risk to public health
due to
 the
smoke
. In conclusion, permitting smoking in the designated area offers a bigger advantage for society as a whole.
Submitted by zia_ardhi on

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