IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

The plan below show a public park when it first opened in 1920 and the same park today Summarise the information by sellecting and reporting the main features and make comparisms where relevant

#plan #show #park #first #summarise #information #features #comparisms
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The map illustrates the development which took place in a recreational area at Grange between 1920 and today.
Overall
Linking Words
, a comparison of the two maps reveals some significant changes from a simple park to a sophisticated entertainment area. In 1920, the park was more of a
rose
Use synonyms
garden
Use synonyms
 with two entrances situated at the north and south region,
then
Linking Words
 a fountain at the centre with a stage building for musicians at the west corner, but
this
Linking Words
 day, the relaxing centre has experienced a complete transformation. The most noticeable is the fountain being removed and replaced with a
rose
Use synonyms
garden
Use synonyms
 having four seats surrounding it,
then
Linking Words
 at the west is the musical stage demolished to make way for an Amphitheatre for concerts.
Moreover
Linking Words
, at the
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
northeast the
rose
Use synonyms
garden
Use synonyms
 and water pond were covered with a café and children's play area respectively,
then
Linking Words
 the glass house was removed, replacing it with water features.
In contrast
Linking Words
, only the north and south entrances remain at the same location, including a
rose
Use synonyms
garden
Use synonyms
 by the side of the concert theatre. A new entrance is
also
Linking Words
 created by the east corner of the park that opens into an underground parking lounge.
Submitted by zikahill48 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: