IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

33.Too much money is spent looking after and repairing old buildings. Some people think we should knock old buildings down and build new modern ones. To what extent to you agree or disagree? Write an essay with no less than 250 words.

#money #buildings #people #ones
Nowadays, a lot of money is being spent on repairing old
buildings
. But I think
instead
 of repairing them, they should be demolished and new
buildings
 should be constructed. There is clear evidence that day by day, so many
buildings
 are becoming abandoned wastes in city areas, which is causing harm to the environment of those places.
Moreover
, many people live in those old
buildings
, which puts them at severe risk to their lives. To keep them risk-free at a minimum rate, the building owners are somehow initiating some construction work to repair those
buildings
.
However
,
such
 a temporary measure cannot provide a permanent solution to the underlying issue. There is a possibility that dilapidated structures may collapse suddenly without prior warning, causing significant damage. That could cause a massive accident.
Such
 an issue can be solved by building new
ones
instead
 of repairing the old
ones
. The repairing process of old
buildings
 can be expensive and
also
 causes significant environmental pollution. Mostly, taking that step will not lead to a positive outcome.
On the other hand
, new
buildings
 can provide sufficient security for those who live there.
Furthermore
, it will become a permanent solution to the housing problem faced by many individuals. Money will
also
 be properly utilized during the process.
Additionally
, there have been numerous modern architectural innovations occurring in the contemporary era. The new
buildings
 can receive the touch of
such
 innovation and become a significant piece of beauty. To summarize, repairing old
buildings
instead
 of building new
ones
 does not seem like a good idea at all.
Therefore
, I personally believe that building new
ones
 is a better approach than repairing the old
ones
.
Submitted by 2083749065 on

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When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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