the two maps below show road access to a city hospital in 2007 and in 2010.

the two maps below show road access to a city hospital in 2007 and in 2010.
The two maps illustrate the specified
road
which has access to a
city
hospital in two different years. In the year 2007, there is just one entrance to the Hospital
road
which they can pass the
city
road
and
then
turn to the northern. The
road
has three bus stations
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
each
sides
Change to a singular noun
side
show examples
. So, there would be
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
good accessibility for people.
Moreover
, there is a
car
park
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
the east side of the Hospital
road
which is provided for both
staffs
Fix the agreement mistake
staff
show examples
and
Correct article usage
the publics
show examples
publics
Fix the agreement mistake
public
show examples
.
While
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
the
car
park has a door to a Ring
road
which is making
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
full access to the
city
hospital. On the other map, three years later there are a lot of differences in
roads
Change the noun form
road
show examples
design. They can go along the
city
road
then
Correct word choice
and then
show examples
turn left, at the roundabout there are two exits. One of them is a
road
to the
road
called Hospital
road
Capitalize word
Road
show examples
and the one in the west is ended
to
Change preposition
at
show examples
a big area for
bus
Add an article
the bus
a bus
show examples
stop.
Then
, they can connect to the Hospital
road
.
Moreover
,
at
Change preposition
on
show examples
the right side of the Hospital
road
is a staff
car
parks
Correct the article-noun agreement
park
show examples
.
In addition
, at the roundabout in
second
Change the article
the second
show examples
square
Add a comma
,square
show examples
they can exit by the first exit and continue
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Ring
road
Capitalize word
Road
show examples
to see another
car
park which is for ordinary people.
Overall
, there have been a lot of changes in
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
road
access to a hospital in 2007 and in 2010.
Submitted by javadsaady1992 on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "moreover".
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 71%.
Vocabulary: Replace the words road, city, car with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: The word "maps" was used 2 times.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • accessibility
  • dual carriageway
  • roundabout
  • traffic flow
  • multi-story car park
  • green spaces
  • pedestrian provisions
  • footpaths
  • traffic signals
  • construction phase
  • ambulances
  • carriageway expansion
  • traffic congestion
  • pedestrian crossings
  • urban planning
  • infrastructure development
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