Some children spend hours everyday on their smartphones Why is this the case? Do you think this a positive or negative development?

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Some
kids
Use synonyms
use their devices for hours every day, nowadays with drastic technological development it is
being
Unnecessary verb
apply
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very common for
children
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having
Change the verb form
to have
show examples
smartphones.
Although
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we could say that on
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
positive side
kid
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kids
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are learning new things every day at their fingertip but it
also
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it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
makes them
addictive
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addicted
show examples
with
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to
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stuffs
Change the wording
stuff
kinds of stuff
pieces of stuff
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like games and videos. If we look back a few decades ago when we were a child, we do not even know what
smart phone
Correct your spelling
smartphone
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is we will be contacting our friends through
landline
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the landline
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or through
parents’
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our parents’
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phone
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phones
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,
we
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and we
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had very limited media of communication for knowing any current affairs, but
kids
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nowadays know all the information digitally through their smart gadgets, by
these
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,these
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they are exploring and learning new things.
Children
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gets
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get
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innovative and creative ideas through these smart devices.
For example
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, BYJU’s an online application platform which
enable
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enables
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kids
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who
studies
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study
show examples
kinder garden can do their schooling online just with one smartphone. Admittedly,
Usage
Correct article usage
the Usage
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of smartphones
also
Linking Words
have
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has
show examples
negative
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a negative
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impact on
kids
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.
By
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This
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this
Linking Words
growing trend of technology even though
kids
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learn new things from
this
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,
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
also
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makes them
addictive
Replace the word
addicted
show examples
by spending more time on
screen
Correct article usage
the screen
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, adding to which results in having eyesight problems at a very small age.
Children
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use more
of
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apply
show examples
social platforms which
enabling
Wrong verb form
enable
show examples
them
communicate
Add the particle
to communicate
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anywhere around the world through one message, so they miss
to have
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having
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a real-life experience of face-to-face communication.
For example
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,
Children
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nowadays
relay
Correct your spelling
rely
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more on video games
instead
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physical sports
such
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as cricket,
football
Correct word choice
and football
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. In conclusion,
although
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using smart gadgets have some positive impact by making communication easy and exploring more knowledge through
fingertip
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the fingertip
show examples
but
Remove the conjunction
apply
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it
also
Linking Words
as
Correct your spelling
has
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negative
Add an article
the negative
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impact
such
Linking Words
as making
children
Use synonyms
addictive
Replace the word
addicted
show examples
virtually with no physical activity which results in laziness and health issues at
very
Add an article
a very
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young age.
Submitted by vyshu.bakkiam on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • smartphones
  • usage
  • technology
  • accessibility
  • convenience
  • entertainment
  • gaming
  • social media
  • communication
  • educational resources
  • addiction
  • dependence
  • negative effects
  • physical health
  • mental health
What to do next:
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