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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The bar chart illustrates the percentage of how parents in a country spent time taking care their children in the evening in 2022. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The bar chart illustrates the percentage of how parents in a country spent time taking care their children in the evening in 2022. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
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The bar chart gives information about the percentage of how
parents
Use synonyms
 in a country spent time taking care of their
children
Use synonyms
such
Linking Words
 as dressing, doing homework, playing games, and preparing for bed in the evening in 2022.
Overall
Linking Words
, in all activities,
mothers
Use synonyms
 and
both
Use synonyms
parents
Use synonyms
 together taking care of their
children
Use synonyms
 were
both
Use synonyms
 over
fathers
Use synonyms
 do. It is evident that
mothers
Use synonyms
 get dressed and do homework with their
children
Use synonyms
 more than
fathers
Use synonyms
 and
both
Use synonyms
parents
Use synonyms
 together in order over 70% and 50%.
However
Linking Words
, for playing games and preparing for bed,
mothers
Use synonyms
 do not
much
Add a missing verb
do much
show examples
 more than
both
Use synonyms
parents
Use synonyms
 together in order over 20% and over 40%.
Besides
Linking Words
,
fathers
Use synonyms
 didn't take care of their
children
Use synonyms
 pretty much with all activities being well under 10%.
It is clear that
Linking Words
both
Use synonyms
parents
Use synonyms
 together played games with their
children
Use synonyms
 at 70% compared to
mothers
Use synonyms
 and
fathers
Use synonyms
 with
both
Use synonyms
 just under 30%.
In addition
Linking Words
, preparing for bed was what
both
Use synonyms
parents
Use synonyms
 did with their
children
Use synonyms
 at 50%, the highest percentage in 3.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 91%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words parents, children, mothers, both, fathers with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • bar chart
  • Percentage
  • Parents
  • Spent time
  • Taking care
  • Children
  • Evening
  • 2022
  • Summarise
  • Information
  • Main features
  • Comparisons
  • Relevant
  • Patterns
  • Trends
  • Highest
  • Lowest
  • Activities
  • Gender
  • Conclusion
  • Findings
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