IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

In some countries, there is not enough respect for elderly people. Why is this the case Suggest some solutions to address this issue.

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In some nations, there is not sufficient
respect
Use synonyms
 for senior individuals. there are several causes of these
Use synonyms
issue
Fix the agreement mistake
issues
show examples
 including,
absence
Correct article usage
the absence
show examples
 of strict punishments, and social
media
Use synonyms
,
howover
Correct your spelling
moreover
, I would like to recommend some measures to address
this
Linking Words
issue
Use synonyms
such
Linking Words
 as
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
government
Add an article
the government
show examples
 could
introudce
Correct your spelling
introduce
laws
Use synonyms
 and raise awareness among
public
Add an article
the public
show examples
 regarding
respect
Use synonyms
 for older
people
Use synonyms
. On the one hand, the primary reason why in some countries there is not enough
respect
Use synonyms
 for
aging
Change the spelling
ageing
show examples
people
Use synonyms
 is
absence
Add an article
the absence
an absence
show examples
 of harsh punishments. To illustrate,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
most countries do not have
laws
Use synonyms
 to protect elderly
people
Use synonyms
 from indiscipline
behaviour
Use synonyms
 , which
Linking Words
this
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
can encourage children to misbehaviour against older
people
Use synonyms
. Social
media
Use synonyms
 is another reason why In some nations, there is not sufficient
respect
Use synonyms
 for older
people
Use synonyms
.
For example
Linking Words
, some famous
people
Use synonyms
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 social
media
Use synonyms
 platforms namely, Facebook, Twitter, and Snapchat make unacceptable
behaviour
Use synonyms
 against older
people
Use synonyms
, which
Linking Words
this
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
can make indiscipline
behaviour
Use synonyms
 normal among children.
Therefore
Linking Words
, children will copy what they see
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 social
media
Use synonyms
 and make unacceptable
behaviour
Use synonyms
 against elderly
people
Use synonyms
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, there are several actions to tackle
this
Linking Words
issue
Use synonyms
. The first effective action,
the
Add a missing verb
is the
show examples
 authorities could introduce harsh
laws
Use synonyms
 in order to protect older
people
Use synonyms
 from misbehaviour.
For example
Linking Words
, in Saudi
Arabia
Add a comma
,Arabia
show examples
people
Use synonyms
 who make indiscipline
behaviour
Use synonyms
 toward older
people
Use synonyms
 receive prison punishment for one year . The second efficient solution,
Add a missing verb
is the
show examples
the
Correct your spelling
that
show examples
 governments could launch
eduational
Correct your spelling
educational
 campaigns in order to raise awareness among
public
Add an article
the public
show examples
 about
value
Add an article
the value
show examples
 of
respect
Use synonyms
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
aging
Change the spelling
ageing
show examples
people
Use synonyms
, which
this
Linking Words
 step can
boosts
Change the verb form
boost
show examples
relatioships
Correct your spelling
relationships
 among all age groups .
To sum up
Linking Words
, there are different causes of
these
Change the determiner
this issue
these issues
show examples
issue
Use synonyms
 namely ,
absence
Correct article usage
the absence
show examples
 of tough punishments, and social
media
Use synonyms
,
howover
Correct your spelling
however
, I suggested some solutions to eliminate
this
Linking Words
issue
Use synonyms
such
Linking Words
 as
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
government
Add an article
the government
show examples
 could
introudce
Correct your spelling
introduce
laws
Use synonyms
 and raise awareness among
public
Correct article usage
the public
show examples
 in terms of
respect
Use synonyms
 for senior
people
Use synonyms
.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Answer the 'Problem and Solution' topic

Problem-and-solution essays fall naturally into two parts, the first describing and exploring the problem, the second setting out the solution or solutions.

You essay structure should look something like this:

  • Introduction
  • Body paragraph 1 – Problems
  • Body paragraph 2 – Solutions
  • Conclusion

Examples to start your body paragraph:

  • One of the first problems of the...
  • Another problem that needs to be considered...
  • A possible solution to this problem would be...
  • One immediate practical solution is to...

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: