IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

The chart below shows the places visited by different people living in Australia

The chart below shows the places visited by different people living in Australia
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The chart provides information about the sites which was visited by different
people
Use synonyms
such
Linking Words
 as
Correct pronoun usage
those
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who
born
Add a missing verb
were born
show examples
 in
Australia
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, new
migrants
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 born in English-speaking country and new
migrants
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 born in other
countries
Use synonyms
.
Overall
Linking Words
, the most attended place is
cinema
Correct article usage
the cinema
show examples
, as the
least
Correct your spelling
last
show examples
 one is
theatre
Add an article
a theatre
the theatre
show examples
 in three groups. The average percentages of visited locations are related to
zoo
Correct article usage
the zoo
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 and library. Cinema shows 70 % of
people
Use synonyms
 who
was
Change the verb form
were
show examples
 born in
Australia
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, about 65% of new
migrants
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 who
was
Change the verb form
were
show examples
 born in English-speaking country and 50% of new
migrantswho
Correct your spelling
migrants who
Add a missing verb
were
show examples
born in other
countries
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. Meanwhile, the least visited settlement is theatre
by
Change preposition
apply
show examples
showing 20% of
people
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 from
Australia
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, around 25 % of new
migrants
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 who
was
Change the verb form
were
show examples
born in English-speaking country and only 10 % of new
migrants
Use synonyms
 who
was
Change the verb form
were
show examples
 born in other
countries
Use synonyms
.
Hence
Linking Words
,
people
Use synonyms
 who
was
Change the verb form
were
show examples
 born in
Australia
Use synonyms
 (above 40%) and new
migrants
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 from
English speaking
Add a hyphen
English-speaking
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countries
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 (40% ) mostly prefer zoo rather than library
whereas
Linking Words
library
Add an article
the library
show examples
 is visited mainly by new
migrants
Use synonyms
 from
another
Replace the adjective
another country
other countries
show examples
countries
Use synonyms
.

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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words people, australia, migrants, countries with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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