The graph shows the number of people taking parts in 4 kinds of sports in a particular region between 1985 and 2005.

#people #parts #kinds #sports #region

The provided line graph illustrates how many individuals participated in a group of sports

Change preposition

in at

show examples

Correct your spelling

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specific district over two decades.

Over all

Correct your spelling

Overall

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. It is evident that people had overwhelming interests in Rugby at the beginning and

on the contrary

with Tennis

at the end

. At

the

Correct article usage

apply

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first glance,

while

Rugby constituted the highest point

in1985

Correct your spelling

in 1985

and recorded nearly 250 individuals,

this

game depicted a dramatic decline to touch the lowest point

at the end

of the period to meet with

Bedminton

Correct your spelling

Badminton

at 50 athletes.

However

, Tennis provided the second

popular

Correct quantifier usage

most popular

show examples

game

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1985 after Rugby playing, it rocketed to hit

the

Change the word

its

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peak

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2005 when boasted

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apply

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well over 200

participatory

Replace the word

participants

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Furthermore

, over the periods, Basketball and

Bedminton

Correct your spelling

badminton

registered a plateau trend.

While

they remained static, the number of

Baskeball

Correct your spelling

basketballs

surpassed

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

Bedminton

by roughly a quarter as Basketball given nearly under 100 but

Bedminton

had exactly 50

one

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

Submitted by alaan0542 on Thu Aug 03 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "at the end, while".

▼

Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.

Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words bedminton with synonyms.

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Vocabulary: The word "provided" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "nearly" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
16Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

149 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

participants
participation
trend
significant increase
decrease
stability
popularity
regional interest
key trends
peaks
troughs
local leagues
school programs
media influence
public health initiatives
availability of facilities
competitive success
fluctuations
impact
major tournaments
notable players
local clubs
coaching programs

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The graph shows the number of people taking parts in 4 kinds of sports in a particular region between 1985 and 2005.

Q) Some people prefer to spend their lives doing the same things and avoid any change. others, however, think that change is always a good thing. discuss both views and give your opinion.

It is the duty of governments to protect children's health by fighting obesity. The government should implement laws against sugary drinks and fast food restaurants and take other measures as well. Do you agree or disagree with the statement.

Rich countries often give money to poorer countries, but it does not solve poverty. Therefore, developed countries should give other types of help to the poor countries rather than financial aid. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

It is important for people to take risks, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking ricks outweigh the disadvantages?

In today’s world, private companies rather than the government pay for and conduct most scientific research. Do you think the disadvantages outweigh the advantages?