Some people believe that it is good to share as much information as possible in scientific research, business and the academic world. Others belive that some imformation is too important or too valuable to be shared freely.
A group of individuals present the view that sharing
information
freely in each field of research, business and academia is beneficial, whereas
others believe that some information
is extremely invaluable and posing too much of them
can cause major issues. I completely agree with the former opinion.
On one hand, some people justifiably believe that sharing Correct pronoun usage
it
knowledge
as much as possible is a decisive factor in different approaches. It is undeniable that being knowledgeable plays a crucial role in the modern world. Therefore
, distributing information
can solidify and accelerates
the progress of advancement. It can broaden a country’s horizons in order to utilize Correct subject-verb agreement
accelerate
this
knowledge
to enhance the circumstances in a particular aspect. Moreover
, this
measure can lead to a boost in the quality and efficiency of production in an economic atmosphere. For example
, due to
sharing innovations and knowledge
companies like Apple and Samsung have made people’s lives simplified competitively. Each of them strives for a greater production method and makes more profit as well.
On the other hand
, another group of the population debate
that posing too much Correct subject-verb agreement
debates
information
can cause major problems. They insist that some of this
information
can be used in a harmful way and be a threat to the world. However
, I do not find this
argument convincing as rarely does it happen that the governments do not allocate the harnessing ways of using this
knowledge
. Therefore
, with these up-to-the-minute gadgets, it is essential for countries to anticipate crimes which are associated with new information
. For instance
, some governments do not authorize using
some websites in their countries.
Wrong verb form
the use of
To conclude
, in my view, sharing information
can augment progress. It plays a vital role to prompt
companies to introduce a greater product. Change preposition
in prompting
Moreover
, the governments give a head to anticipate limitations so as to abolish crimes.Submitted by fatemeh.gh9797 on
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coherence
The essay shows a good level of clarity and structural coherence. However, make sure to organize your ideas in a way that continuously flows toward your conclusion. Some parts of the essay seemed a bit disjointed or disconnected from the other parts.
task response
You answered the task completely and provided clear ideas to support your answer. However, the ideas could be expanded more thoroughly for a higher score. The arguments, while relevant, could benefit from deeper analysis and a more comprehensive discussion.
examples
Ensure you provide specific examples to illustrate your points more vividly. Some of your examples lack specificity and do not entirely support the point they are supposed to illustrate. Providing a factual or detailed example can help to make your arguments more convincing.