It is important for people to take risks in their personal and professional lives do you think advantages over weight the did advantages
It's necessary for people to be risk-takers in both their jobs and personal lives, I believe that
it's
advantages overweigh the disadvantages. Replace the word
its
As taking
Change preposition
Taking
risks
lead to personal and professional development, However
, it's uncomfortable and may lead to lose
your job Change the verb form
losing
for ever
.
The main Correct your spelling
forever
disadvantages
of surrounding ourselves with risky Fix the agreement mistake
disadvantage
desicions
Correct your spelling
decisions
that
our Add a missing verb
is that
life
will be fluctuated, with ups and downs. Although
that
, Sometimes we will make excessive progress, at our career level we may make a huge profit at times. other times we may not earn the gross profit that makes us pay wages to our employees. Correct determiner usage
apply
This
is a difficult problem as it may lead to difficencey
in Correct your spelling
differences
company
,s balance sheets. Many companies can't afford it and close their business. Correct article usage
the company
For instance
, during Corona it
was aCorrect pronoun usage
apply
trasportation
Correct your spelling
transportation
company
called cairo
Egypt in Egypt his owner was a risky person, Change the capitalization
Cairo
although
he was having a problem Correct word choice
and although
in
managing his Change preposition
apply
company
because of the corruption of his employees, he continued until he lost his company
. All those problems reflect on personal
self steam, Correct pronoun usage
their personal
his personal
her personal
therefore
he may suffer in his personal life
.
The advantages of risk-taker persons they can enjoy the
Correct article usage
apply
life
more than the
others who are risk avoiders. They can learn from their mistakes but they must be wise persons during taking Correct article usage
apply
their
Correct pronoun usage
apply
risks
even though at their personal risks
, as it will reflects
on their jobs. Wrong verb form
reflect
For example
, Mark when he decided to open his company
,:
Facebook he was a young risky man .Change the punctuation
apply
therefore
, his idea was a new one and it seems that he was a dreamy person, however
, that
his friends Correct word choice
apply
was
laughing when they hired his idea, his business in modern days is one of the most successful enterprinchipe in the world.
In conclusion, even though, sometimes Change the verb form
were
risks
are really dangerous, in my opinion taking it
gives us exciting Correct pronoun usage
them
life
and success stories .Submitted by someysamanoudi on
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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite