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NOW A DAYS MORE AND MORE YOUNG PEOPLE HOLD THE IMPORTANT POSITIONS IN THE GOVERNMENT. SOME PEOPLE THINK THAT THIS IS A GOOD THING WHILE OTHERS ARGUE THAT IT IS NOT SUITABLE. DISCUSS BOTH VIEWS AND GIVE YOUR OPINION.

#people #positions #government
In
this
 era, bureaucracy is providing opportunities to youngsters, especially.
Consequently
, it has been frequently argued that it is a positive change and supported by inhabitants,
whereas
 opponents consider it could have an adverse impact on the public. In
this
, essay I would like to shed light on both perspectives
along with
 my viewpoint in the upcoming paragraphs.
To begin
 with, holding power at a young age proved to be an effective decision as it could have the following benefits.
Initially
, youngsters are well aware of the latest technology, in fact, they are quick learners and
could
Wrong verb form
can
show examples
 easily adapt to new techniques. So, they could develop the country not only financially, but
also
 technically as they would give importance to it and provide adequate funds.
Besides
, they could use their mind
for solving
Change preposition
to solve
show examples
 problems as they might provide new ideas to tackle difficult situations.
For instance
, adults are aware of the mindset of the masses of their generation,
therefore
, they could encourage them
accordingly
Rephrase
apply
show examples
to act correctly.
On the other hand
, some people opine that there are some demerits if young people would rule the nation. To commence with, they argue that adults might not have enough knowledge and experience to assume the situation with a wide horizon, and they might not be able to
take
Correct your spelling
make
show examples
 decisions in the favour of different age groups.
Moreover
, there are specific techniques required to work with the public, they might not have enough patience to address the crowd.
For example
, young prefer to work on their conditions, rather than as per others' aspirations and frequently lose their temper. In conclusion, there is no doubt fresh graduates come up with new techniques to reduce the workload,
however
, they might not have enough experience or patience to serve different types of people. In my opinion, the high authorities ought to provide opportunities in the public sector to avoid its consequences they could have trained experienced workers.
Submitted by lavisharma622 on

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task response
Your essay addresses the task to some extent, but it lacks focus and coherence. Make sure to fully address all parts of the task question and maintain a clear and relevant overall position throughout the essay.
coherence cohesion
The essay lacks a clear logical progression of ideas. Work on structuring your essay with clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. Also, use cohesive devices to link ideas more effectively.
lexical resource
While your vocabulary shows some range, there are instances of inappropriate word choice and awkward phrasing. Try to use a wider range of vocabulary and use words appropriately in context.
grammatical range
There are several grammatical errors in your essay, including verb tense inconsistency, subject-verb agreement issues, and awkward sentence structures. Work on improving your sentence structures and use of appropriate grammar rules.
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