The diagram below represents the changes in yearly pay out by local authorities in Someland in 1980,1990,2000

The diagram below represents the changes in yearly

pay out

Correct your spelling

payout

show examples

by local authorities in Someland in 1980,1990,2000 It is noticeable that

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

alll

Correct your spelling

all

period

Fix the agreement mistake

periods

show examples

higher

education

Use synonyms

is the most spending in

Someland

Correct your spelling

Homeland

. As

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

shows

Wrong verb form

shown

show examples

in the diagram, in 1980 K-12

Education

Use synonyms

also

Linking Words

had higher spending,

while

Linking Words

the

lest

Correct your spelling

least

show examples

expenditure was

Change preposition

on Enviromental

show examples

Enviromental

Correct your spelling

Environmental

services and

other

Fix the agreement mistake

others

show examples

Change preposition

This

show examples

this

Linking Words

year Transportation

and

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

Health and human resources were pretty similar to each other’s outlay. In 1990, K-12

Education

Use synonyms

and Health and human resources

was

Change the verb form

were

show examples

alike,

while

Linking Words

the other three were

also

Linking Words

close to each other’s spending. In two thousand, Transportation costing was over 22% and more than other

periods

Change noun form

periods'

period's

show examples

expenditure.

However

Linking Words

, other expenditures were less than that two years.

For example

Linking Words

, Health and human resources and Environmental services were nearly

one tenth

Add a hyphen

one-tenth

show examples

while

Linking Words

K-12

Education

Use synonyms

costs over nine-fiftieth. And other spending measures were only 1%. From the point of view, before the two-thousand all outlays were significantly more than in two-thousand.

dnm.best

Aug 9, 2023

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site's author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.

▼

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also, while".

▼

Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.

▼

Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 100%.

▼

Vocabulary: Replace the words education with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "represents" in your introduction.

▼

Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "changes" in your introduction.

▼

Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "diagram" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.

▼

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

5
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
16
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

158 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6
band
Some people think secondary school students should study international news as one of their subjects, while others believe that this is a waste of valuable school time. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
Major of people thinks that students of junior high school ought to learn international news as one of their subjects while others believe that this can be a waste of valuable time. In my opinion, learning international news can help students get along with the globe and it also enriches children's knowledge.
6
band
In the future all cars, buses and trucks will be driverless. The only people traveling inside thes vehicles will be passengers. Do you think the advantages of driverless vehicles outweigh the disadvantages?
In our modern society, technology has developed in different fields, especially public transport. It is believed that all means of transport will be able to move without a driver but there will also be some drawbacks.
6.5
band
Older Building is preserving worth more than other one
The importance of old buildings preserving worthier than others was debatable and has become controversial. The opinion on preserving buildings varies, some argue there is no meaning, while others believe it’s worthwhile for cultural, aesthetic or historical. In my view, preserving old buildings is important because it helps maintain our cultural heritage, showcases architectural history and contributes to the sense of identity in a community.
7.5
band
Many animals are endangered in the environment. Some people argue that we should only protect those endangered animals that are useful to human. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
When it comes to endangered animal protection, some people claim that only endangered species which can provide various benefits are supposed to be protected. I oppose this view and believe that all endangered creatures should be protected.
7
band
Some countries have an ever-increasing proportion of population who are aged at 15 or younger. What is your opinion of the current and future effects it may have in those countries
The percentage of middle childhood age-groups has been surging in many nations around the world. There are numerous factors contributing to the increase in teenagers in many countries, which can cause present and long-term consequences in those countries. I will explain the impacts of a hike in the adolescent population in the forthcoming paragraphs.

The diagram below represents the changes in yearly pay out by local authorities in Someland in 1980,1990,2000

Some people think secondary school students should study international news as one of their subjects, while others believe that this is a waste of valuable school time. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

In the future all cars, buses and trucks will be driverless. The only people traveling inside thes vehicles will be passengers. Do you think the advantages of driverless vehicles outweigh the disadvantages?

Older Building is preserving worth more than other one

Many animals are endangered in the environment. Some people argue that we should only protect those endangered animals that are useful to human. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some countries have an ever-increasing proportion of population who are aged at 15 or younger. What is your opinion of the current and future effects it may have in those countries