In traditional or religious festivals. during festival periods people nowadays only want to enjoy themselves to what extent you agree or disagree with this opinion?

#festivals #periods #people

this

contemporary era, it is argued that people nowadays want themselves to

set

Add a missing verb

be set

show examples

free and only enjoy during festivals and traditional occasions. In my opinion, I completely agree with

this

statement because they are completely influenced by social media and it provides them the instant gratification. In conclusion, I wholeheartedly agree that individuals are showing interest in enjoying their special cultural occasions because of the dependency and influence on platforms like

facebook

Capitalize word

Facebook

show examples

instagra

Correct your spelling

Instagram

, and

also

the satisfaction that they gain

due to

social gatherings.

Submitted by chandralekha1993 on Wed Aug 09 2023

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task achievement

Expand your ideas with clear and relevant examples to strengthen your argument.

coherence cohesion

Organize your essay into separate paragraphs for introduction, main points, and conclusion.

task achievement

Elaborate on each main point to ensure your ideas are comprehensive and well-developed.

coherence cohesion

Your introduction and conclusion are clear and provide a straightforward response to the prompt.

task achievement

The main points you raised—social media influence and instant gratification—are relevant to the topic.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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3Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Grammar mistakes
 

2 paragraphs

86 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

commercialization
cultural heritage
globalization
individualism
instant gratification
media influence
traditional customs
religious significance
contemporary festivities
blend
preserving traditions
generational differences
broad societal changes
collective activities

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In traditional or religious festivals. during festival periods people nowadays only want to enjoy themselves to what extent you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

In many countries around the world , rural people are moving to cities ,so the population in the country side is decreasing Do you think it is a positive or a negative development

In a public-funded health care system people who are willing to pay for the best and fastest treatment should be able to do so. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge and experience.

Some parents believe that their children should do extra-curricular activities after school. Others say in this way children are under pressure. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Large companies should pay higher salaries to CEOs and executives, compared to other workers. To what extent do you agree or disagree ?

Nowadays more and more people have access to the Internet. But constant availability of any information worsens people's memory and critical thinking skills. To what extent do you agree or disagree?