IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

The chart below shows the total number of minutes (in billions) of telephone calls in the UK, divided into three categories, from 1995-2002.

The chart below shows the total number of minutes (in billions) of telephone calls in the UK, divided into three categories, from 1995-2002.
#minutes #billions #telephone #uk #three #categories
The bar graph illustrates the total
number
 of
minutes
measure
Wrong verb form
measured
show examples
 by
billions
 of telephone calls in the
united
Capitalize word
United
show examples
 Kingdom, in three kinds of
call
Fix the agreement mistake
calls
show examples
, over 7 years.
Overall
,
it is clear that
 calls by local -fixed line
was
Change the verb form
were
show examples
highest
Correct article usage
the highest
show examples
numbe
Correct your spelling
number
 in the UK during
given
Add an article
a given
show examples
 period ,
whereas
 mobiles
was
Change the verb form
were
show examples
least
Change the article
the least
show examples
number
.
Furthermore
, calls by
local -fixed
Correct your spelling
local-fixed
show examples
was
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
increased over
given
Add an article
the given
a given
show examples
 period but at certain years showed
decline
Correct article usage
a decline
show examples
,
while
others
Correct quantifier usage
other
show examples
 forms of
Add an article
the call
show examples
call
Fix the agreement mistake
calls
show examples
 showed raised . Looking at
bar
Correct article usage
the bar
show examples
 chart in more detail, In 1995 the local -fixed line was the highest
number
 of
foms
Correct your spelling
forms
 of
call
Correct subject-verb agreement
calls
show examples
 approximately 72
minutes
 (
billions
) .
In contrast
, mobiles
was
Change the verb form
were
show examples
lowest
Change the article
the lowest
show examples
number
 at around 3 72
minutes
 (
billions
). In 1999,
local -fixed
Correct your spelling
local-fixed
show examples
 reached a peak at almost 90
minutes
 (
billions
) and after
that
Add a comma
,that
show examples
 it showed
decreased
Replace the word
decrease
show examples
 and in 2002 at
lowed
Add an article
the lowed
a lowed
show examples
 point at around 72
minutes
 (
billions
). In comparison,
2002
Change preposition
in 2002
show examples
 both national and international -fixed line and
moblies
Correct your spelling
mobiles
mobile
movies
 at their highest point at 60 and 46
minutes
 (
billions
), respectively.
Submitted by faiz3177 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Vocabulary: Replace the words number, minutes, billions with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "number of" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "give" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "showed" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
▼

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • total number
  • minutes
  • telephone calls
  • UK
  • divided into
  • categories
  • from
  • to
  • overall
  • increased significantly
  • local fixed-line calls
  • accounted for
  • largest proportion
  • throughout
  • period
  • international calls
  • highest rate of growth
  • experiencing
  • sharp increase
  • national long-distance calls
  • remained relatively stable
  • slight decline
  • towards
  • end
What to do next:
Look at other essays: