Many people aim to achieve a balance in between their work and lives, but few people achieve it. What are the causes of this? How to overcome this problem? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. You should write at least 250 words.

In
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
modern
life
, the topic of which few
people
make a balance between personal
life
and
work
has provoked a
heat
Replace the word
heated
show examples
discussion. Under
such
high stress of
work
condition
Fix the agreement mistake
conditions
show examples
and high expenditure
of
Change preposition
on
show examples
social
life
, it is a normal phenomenon that most
people
can’t control their
life
and
work
wonderfully. And the
government
and
company
Fix the agreement mistake
companies
show examples
should pay attention to
solve
Wrong verb form
solving
show examples
the problem. The
work
of most
civilian
Fix the agreement mistake
civilians
show examples
is enough
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
complicated and
stress
Replace the word
stressful
show examples
. The leader usually commands a
lot
Add the preposition
oflot
show examples
work
once a
time
, in order to solve it and avoid
being deduct
Change the verb form
being deducted
show examples
wages, the staff have to
work
for a long
time
on it even
it
Correct word choice
if it
show examples
is
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
time
of
life
.
This
phenomenon becomes more and more
generally
Change the word
general
show examples
, it caused that so many
people
can’t have enough to enjoy their own
life
. What’s more, the spending of our social
life
in
modern
Add an article
the modern
show examples
city has become more and more expensive. The
works
Replace the word
workers
show examples
have to pay more
efforts
Fix the agreement mistake
effort
show examples
to do
work
better to get admire of their leader which is the key to
get
Wrong verb form
getting
show examples
a better salary job. More ridiculous is that some
people
even choose to do a free-
time
job to sustain their daily
life
.
For example
, some
people
to
Fix the infinitive
apply
show examples
do more than three kinds of jobs to repay the loan of buying
a
Change the article
an
show examples
apartment. These conditions really disrupt the counterpart relationship between
work
and
life
, I think
company
Correct article usage
the company
show examples
and
government
should better do something to deal with it.
Firstly
,
company
Add an article
the company
a company
show examples
could reduce the pressure
of
Change preposition
on
show examples
their
staffs
Change noun form
staff's
show examples
daily works,
such
as making a list
Change preposition
of that
show examples
that
Correct word choice
what
show examples
they should and
require
Wrong verb form
requiring
show examples
them must leave the offices when it is
time
off
work
. Secondarily, the
government
could set a foundation to help those
people
who can’t afford the daily essential things. By doing these, I believe that
people
could have
a
Change the article
an
show examples
enjoyable
life
. In conclusion, stressful
work
and high expenditure of
life
is the reason to broke the balance between
life
and
work
. The
company
should reduce the
time
and pressure of
work
and the
government
should pay some grants for
people
.
Submitted by zhaoruolin220 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Work-life balance: the equilibrium between one's job responsibilities and personal life.
  • Overwork: working too hard or for excessive amounts of time.
  • Remote work: working from a location other than the central work office, often from home.
  • Flexible working hours: work hours that are adaptable to suit an employee's needs.
  • Commuting: traveling between one's home and workplace.
  • Digital technology: electronic tools and systems used to generate, store, and process data, often leading to increased connectivity.
  • Disconnect: to detach from technology or work communications, often to establish boundaries.
  • Time management: the ability to use one's time effectively or productively.
  • Prioritize: to determine the order for dealing with tasks according to their importance.
  • Employer support: programs or practices employed by an organization to assist employees in managing work and personal roles.
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