Today, more people are overweight than ever before. What is your opinion are the primary causes of this? What are the main effects of this?

#people #effects

There are two main causes. As societies grew in technology, the need for physically demanding

labor

Change the spelling

labour

show examples

has declined. And,

as a result

, more

people

chose stationary and less active jobs like desk jobs. These jobs don’t require much energy so

people

don't burn as

much

Change the quantifier

many

show examples

calories as they used to, but still eat as much. Leading to excessive calories stored as fat in the body. Resulting in more overweight

people

. The second complementary factor is fast

food

People

used to spend

great

Add an article

a great

show examples

amount of time making

food

on a daily basis.

However

, as technology grows, modern production lines can process

food

at a remarkably fast rate.

Thus

, fast

food

can usually be served in less than an hour compared to traditional

food

. And

people

spend

the

Change the word

their

show examples

freed

Replace the word

free

show examples

time eating more fast

food

that is

high in fat and calory.

As a result

, the overweight population increases.

Submitted by johnny sins on Thu Aug 10 2023

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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4Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Grammar mistakes
 

1 paragraphs

146 words

<40

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Today, more people are overweight than ever before. What is your opinion are the primary causes of this? What are the main effects of this?

Include an introduction and conclusion

People who do not use social media networks* will always fall behind in career development opportunities. To what extent do you feel that this is an accurate and important prediction?

SOME PEOPLE SAY THAT IT IS BETTER TO WORK FOR A LARGE COMPANY THAN A SMALL ONE. DO YOU AGREE OR DISAGREE?

It is becoming increasingly popular to have a year off between finishing school and going to university. What are the advantage and disadvantages of this?

Some parents say that children should play individually more than in a group. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of this and include your own opinion.

There should not be difference in highest paid jobs and loweste paid jobs.