The diagram below shows the changes of a village in 1995 and now.

The pair of maps offered here illustrates the layout of a village in the year 1995 and how it is presently.

Overall

, the Coastal Village relied on fishing commerce and has seen improvements regarding the residential areas currently. In the year 1995, the depicted rural

area

was divided into three sections by a diagonal road stemming from the northwest and a horizontal road to the bottom of the land. These above-mentioned roads

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

formed a junction to the southeast.

Additionally

, these roads were adjacent to a few housing units, shops and a strip of a fish market parallel to them.

Moreover

, the north-western portion assumed the shape of a right triangle, containing a housing

area

While

the

area

opposite it to the east, was dominated by farmland and a forest park, having a minor hotel building to the south.

Furthermore

, to the south of the aforementioned hotel and across the road stood a cafe.

Finally

, the southern boundary of the settlement met with the sea, with a fishing port built to the bottom edge. Today, the

area

has seen remarkable developments regarding the accommodation buildings, evident from the growth in numbers of the mentioned structure to the top left.

Additionally

, the farm and the forest is not merged and it is used as a field for games

such

as golf and tennis. The hotel to the bottom of it has seen the addition of a car park near it. And

finally

, the fishing port has been removed.

Submitted by bhanushalirohan0 on Sat Aug 12 2023

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "additionally, finally".

▼

Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.

Vocabulary: Replace the words area with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

246 words

7.50

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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The diagram below shows the changes of a village in 1995 and now.

in some place old age is valued, while in other cultures youth is considered more important. Discuss both view and give your opinion.

There is an increasing trend around the world of married couples deciding not to have children. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages for couples who decide to do this.

Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of living and working in a foreign country.

some people say that in all level of education, from primary schools to universities, too much time is spent on learning facts and not enough on learning practical skills. Do you agree or disagree?

Nowadays many people choose to be self employed, rather than to work for a organization.What might this be the case? What could be the disadvantages of being self employed.