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Writing Samples /
Band 6

Behaviour in schools is getting worse. Explain the causes and effects of this problem, and suggest some possible solutions.

#behaviour #schools #effects
Children
 are behaving differently in school these days. It has been increasingly challenging for school teachers to manage both students’ academic progress and their behaviour. In
this
 essay, we will discuss about 2 root causes of
this
 issue and ways to
mitigate
Correct pronoun usage
themmitigate
show examples
. The main reasons are
Correct article usage
the internet
show examples
internet
Capitalize word
Internet
show examples
, and
parents
 spending less
time
 with their
children
. With
technology
Replace the word
technological
show examples
 advancement, smartphones,
tablets
Correct word choice
and tablets
show examples
 are part of our daily lives.
This
 means
children
 are
under
Change preposition
at
show examples
 high risk to be exposed to explicit
content
of
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the internet
such
 as violence, sexual, etc. At
young
Add an article
a young
show examples
age
Add a comma
,age
show examples
children
 are unable to differentiate between right and wrong and prolonged exposure to explicit
content
 causes detrimental effects
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
 their behaviour.
Besides
 that, most of the
parents
 have busy schedules, trying to make ends meet and
this
 reduces their interaction
time
 with
children
.
Consequently
,
children
 develop anti-social behaviours in
hope
Correct article usage
the hope
show examples
 of seeking
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
their
parents
Change to a genitive case
parent's
parents'
show examples
 attention. There are possible ways to resolve these challenges.
Firstly
 with smart gadget obsession,
parents
 could restrict their
children
Change noun form
children's
show examples
 screen
time
 to only 30 mins daily or set up
rule
Fix the agreement mistake
rules
show examples
such
 as no hand phone usage
on
Change preposition
at
show examples
dinner
Add an article
the dinner
a dinner
show examples
 table. On the internet
content
,
parents
 can make use of
content
 filtration
feature
Fix the agreement mistake
features
show examples
 in order for their
children
 to browse in
an
Change the article
a
show examples
 safe environment.
Secondly
,
parents
 have to
priorities
Replace the word
prioritise
show examples
 spending quality
time
 with their
children
.
For example
, catching up about the day during dinner meal is a good start to make their
children
 feel cared
and
Change preposition
for and
show examples
 loved. In conclusion, prevention is better than cure.
Parents
 have to put in effort for their
children
 to grow up well and reduce potential social
issue
Fix the agreement mistake
issues
show examples
 in the future.
Submitted by kanchanakularathna1991 on

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