IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

More and more people are moving away from an agricultural background to relocate in order to look for work. What will be consequences of this? What solutions can you offer?

#people #background #work #consequences #offer
A highly controversial issue today relates to the scenario that
people
 are gradually shifting away from the farming business and migrating to other places to do other occupations.In
this
 essay , I am going to discuss the reason behind the situation and
then
 give a solution to the matter. On one side of , the argument there are
people
 who believe that
instead
 of being a farmer there is a better opportunity for an individual to study and do a stable job for livelihood.The reason for believing
this
 is that either there are lack of resources for the process or less amount of money.
Also
 today the youth does not prefer physical hard work and
this
 is why they choose to migrate to different places and do
a table jobs
Correct the article-noun agreement
a table job
table jobs
show examples
.One good illustration of
this
 is farmers do not get the investment they do during the harvesting and end up in debt and sell the land. Taking into consideration,
due to
 the fewer farmers left in society , prices have risen to the sky as the supply is not been met with the demand in
this
 increasing population.The are many
people
 who suffer from starvation as they can not afford to buy food; and
this
 results in malnutrition (more children suffer from malnutrition statistics by WHO). The solution to the problem involves making
people
 aware of the importance of farming , government should offer loans to needy farmers , leasing the land to the
people
 who wish to do cultivation and so on.By offering
such
 help there will be more motivated youngsters who will opt to become a proud farmer.
Submitted by palshah87 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: