Some people believe that rich countries should provide poorer countries with other types of help rather than financial aid. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #countries #aid

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It is argued that developed

countries

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should assist developing

countries

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in other domains as opposed to solely focusing on financial

aid

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While

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economic help is crucial, I do believe that assistance in other domains

also

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plays an indispensable role in these poorer

countries

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. On the one hand, developing

countries

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can benefit a lot from the financial assistance offered by these wealthy economies.

To begin

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with, these poor

countries

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would lift/raise their own international status and influence through the economic growth provided by these rich

nations

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. Under

such

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circumstances, it would

further

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exert positive effects on the

overall

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sense of well-being of citizens since they can obtain plenty of welfare from the booming economy.

For example

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, patients would acquire/enjoy an improved/ enhanced/ better medical treatment/ earlier diagnostics诊断/ advanced equipment and facilities, and older people would have more complete pension systems to facilitate a more secure and stable society, in which citizens have no need to worry about the emergencies taking place in their lives.

On the other hand

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, other means of assistance are important for these poor

nations

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Firstly

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, only financial

aid

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is not a long-term holistic approach.

As a result

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, richer

nations

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ought to/ are supposed to offer other

aid

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for these disadvantaged

countries

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such

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as technological guidance and instructions and educational expertise to stimulate the development of poor

countries

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and inject more vigour into these economies in the long term.

Besides

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, extra kindness would empower these developing

countries

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to become self-sufficient and flourish.

Therefore

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, they can gain profound and long-term financial rewards. In conclusion, my view is that I can understand the reason why individuals tip the balance in favour of the fact that offering financial

aid

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is crucial, but I would argue that supporting other aspects is of equal importance to these

nations

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Submitted by 915818382 on Thu Aug 17 2023

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12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

295 words

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