IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Many people hold the view that it is better to buy their home rather than rent it. Do you agree with this statement or not

#people #home #rent
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The majority of
people
Use synonyms
 find that renting their own
house
Use synonyms
 is more beneficial than buying one. In another way, some
people
Use synonyms
 think paying for a
house
Use synonyms
 is more convenient and more comfortable.
This
Linking Words
 writer certainly
agree
Change the verb form
agrees
show examples
 that buying habitation is the best especially
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
recently and will discuss
below
Correct pronoun usage
it below
show examples
. The rudimentary
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
advantages
Fix the agreement mistake
advantage
show examples
 of buying a
house
Use synonyms
 is that
people
Use synonyms
 can feel more convenient when they own one.
For example
Linking Words
, if
people
Use synonyms
 rent a
house
Use synonyms
 , they have to follow the rules which the owner
given
Add the auxiliary verb
gave
has given
show examples
 before.
At
Change preposition
Consequently
show examples
consequently
Linking Words
, they can feel disagreeable because of following too
much
Correct quantifier usage
many
show examples
 compound
ordinance
Fix the agreement mistake
ordinances
show examples
.
However
Linking Words
, if
people
Use synonyms
 do not rent one, they can save some money or they can make money when they buy a
house
Use synonyms
.
Due to
Linking Words
 not
pay
Wrong verb form
paying
show examples
 for
renting
Wrong verb form
rent
show examples
Use synonyms
house
Correct article usage
a house
show examples
 monthly, they can just pay
as
Change preposition
at
show examples
 once when they buy a
house
Use synonyms
 and if they find that the
house
Use synonyms
 is not more appropriate to live in, they can sell
or
Correct pronoun usage
it or
show examples
 use
for
Correct pronoun usage
it for
show examples
 rent.
As a consequence
Linking Words
, they can escalate their income per month and improve their social life.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the
house
Use synonyms
give
Change the verb form
gives
show examples
people
Use synonyms
 their private space for doing their
works
Fix the agreement mistake
work
show examples
. Individuals have more
place
Fix the agreement mistake
places
show examples
 to complete or do their private work without distracting or commenting by lots of local citizens as so
as
Correct word choice
that
show examples
 their social life become more restful.
Linking Words
Also
Add a comma
,Also
show examples
 humans can control their timetable. They will not care too much about time when they own a
house
Use synonyms
 and they will be free to come back home or go outside without taking the time recently. In conclusion, obtaining a
house
Use synonyms
 can be more restful in your finance and your timetable. You can save and earn more money if you have a plan to raise your income by selling houses or
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
renting.

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • property ladder
  • mortgage
  • rental agreement
  • down payment
  • equity
  • appreciate
  • rental market
  • monthly installments
  • credit score
  • repairs and maintenance
  • landlord
  • tenant
What to do next:
Look at other essays: