The government should reduce the amount of money spent on local environmental problems and instead increase funding into urgent and more threatening issues such as global warming. To what extent do you agree

In
this
day and age, contemporary attention has been placed on whether the government should cut down on funding for domestic environmental concerns and allocate more resources towards emergency and hazardous
problems
like global warming or not. From my point of view, I firmly disagree for the following reasons.
Firstly
, national environmental
problems
result in the most important ecology-related worldwide warming today. In fact, global warming has emerged
as a result
of air pollution in densely populated cities worldwide, stemming from excessive emissions of greenhouse gases and vehicular and industrial fumes.
As a result
, addressing national environmental challenges makes a vital contribution to reducing global environmental issues.
For example
, deforestation has been identified as one of the key factors that contribute to the severe destruction of plants and animals’ habitats and lead to the extinction of some rare animals.
Secondly
, local environmental
problems
directly affect human health, compared to global warming which can cause
far – reaching
Correct your spelling
far–reaching
show examples
effects on our environment for a long time.
This
is because an unhealthy environment may have immediate and critical detrimental consequences for human well-being. To be specific, individuals who have absorbed noxious fumes emitted by factories, industries, and air pollution may experience a range of dangerous and potentially fatal illnesses, including respiratory ailments, dizziness, lung cancer, nerve disorders, and other related conditions. Meanwhile, globalization is likely to make
water
Correct article usage
the water
show examples
level meter higher
at the end
of
this
decade, which [cq][cr]does not create immediately adverse influences on humans. In conclusion, I firmly believe that spending on both local environmental issues and more urgent and dangerous obstacles like global warming’s [cs][ct]attention should be paid by the governments. By doing so they can effectively tackle the interconnected nature of environmental
problems
and safeguard the well-being of both present and future generations.
Submitted by lekaity966 on

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coherence
Develop a more comprehensive and cohesive introduction and conclusion to provide a clear framework for your essay.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

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Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

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Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • urgent issues
  • global warming
  • local environmental problems
  • funding
  • redirecting funds
  • broader environmental health
  • financial efficiency
  • return on investment
  • cost-effective
  • holistic approach
  • moral and ethical considerations
  • resource allocation
  • long-term consequences
  • short-term impacts
  • competing environmental concerns
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