Write about the following topic: Some people think that a sense of competition in children should be encouraged. Others believe that children who are taught to co-operate rather than compete become more useful adults.Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#topic #people #sense #competition #children #co-operate #adults

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

Children are the future of our society and because of that many believe that they should be raised in competitive surroundings in order to be better citizens.

While

Linking Words

others are of the opinion that they should be taught to be a good team member rather than competing with each other. Both views

as well as

Linking Words

my stance on

this

Linking Words

matter are discussed in the

further

Linking Words

paragraphs. The children's rivalry behaviour could have several benefits in society. The predominant cause is it can foster developments and advancements in many aspects of our society. Not only

this

Linking Words

will help them exceed their boundaries but

also

Linking Words

provide them with their Ikigai.

For example

Linking Words

, students competing in a science fair will always try to learn, adapt and apply new things to make their project stand out.

Besides

Linking Words

that, they will

also

Linking Words

get a sense of urgency to learn and explore more of the real world. Perhaps, teaching cooperative behaviour has many positive outcomes. The primary reason is it will serve as a helping hand to others in an indeed need. As in our daily life, nobody is perfect and

due to

Linking Words

that, we rely on others to fulfil our needs. On top of that,

this

Linking Words

type of nature helps youth to learn the importance of teamwork. Imagine a student who participated in a singing competition with an exceptional singing skill, but does not know how to write a song.

Then

Linking Words

student who has better songwriting skills could help the participant write a good song.

To conclude

Linking Words

and provide my opinion on the matter of raising young people with either a competitive or cooperative nature, in my perspective their upbringing should be done both in ways but they should

also

Linking Words

be taught about the clear boundaries of both.

Submitted by ruchin27 on Tue Dec 24 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement

Provide more detailed examples to illustrate points. For example, instead of stating generally that competition can foster developments, include a specific example or scenario that clearly shows this outcome.

task achievement

Consider elaborating more on how both competitive and cooperative skills can be integrated in teaching methodologies, providing some examples or recommendations.

coherence cohesion

Ensure your main points are thoroughly supported with explanations or examples. Some points feel underdeveloped and could benefit from further elaboration.

coherence cohesion

Improve transitions between paragraphs to enhance flow and readability. Some ideas seem abruptly introduced, which could be smoothed with better linking phrases.

task achievement

The essay effectively discusses both viewpoints, demonstrating a balanced approach to the topic.

coherence cohesion

The introduction sets up the discussion effectively, and the conclusion sums up the ideas and offers a personal opinion.

coherence cohesion

The essay contains a clear and logical structure with separate paragraphs dedicated to each viewpoint and the conclusion.

10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

293 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

7.5
band
Some argue that there is no point in spending money on wildlife protection because we humans have no need for them. I totally disagree with this view.
Some argue that there is no point in spending money on wildlife protection because we humans have no need for them. I totally disagree with this view.
6.5
band
In the modern era, it is easy to sell, buy and work with others through the internet. But others are against it. Do you think this is a positive trend or a negative trend?
Whereas some individuals are against practising basic tasks such as commercial operations and work, through Internet, another group support this advancement. This essay strongly believes that internet advancement should be welcomed as, it can help us to save time and extra costs related to transportation when people practice basic tasks. On top of that, it allows to provide access to essential activities around the world, even in rural and remote areas, making the opportunities more equitable for everyone.
6.5
band
Some people think that children should be taught to be competitive in school. Others, however, say that cooperation and team working skills are more important. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.
Although it is sometimes thought that schools ought to teach children to compete, other people believe that the focus should be on cooperation. In my opinion, I consider that competition helps children learn the most important skills for their future life.
8
band
Nowadays, advertisement targeting children is on the rise. Some people think that it has a negative impact and should be banned. Do you agree or disagree?
Since the expansion of media, one of its main usages has been advertisement. The adverts target all age groups including some of the more vulnerable ones, such as children. Many believe that all advertisements targeting them should be excluded from all platforms. This seems to be the correct line of action as the effects of such programmes on children are much deeper than on adults.
6.5
band
Smoking is a habit that claims many lives and is a great drain on health services. One way to combat smoking would be to make it illegal. What are the pros and cons of such a government policy? What alternative strategies can you suggest to combat smoking?
The enormous consumption of healthcare resources and the loss of life could be attributed to smoking. One way of combating this trend is to prohibit the usage. The benefit of making smoking unlawful is that, it will enable smokers to stop the routine. I would suggest that the authorities should enforce strict laws such as imprisonment for anyone found guilty. However, there may be drawbacks to be taken into account.

Some argue that there is no point in spending money on wildlife protection because we humans have no need for them. I totally disagree with this view.

In the modern era, it is easy to sell, buy and work with others through the internet. But others are against it. Do you think this is a positive trend or a negative trend?

Some people think that children should be taught to be competitive in school. Others, however, say that cooperation and team working skills are more important. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

Nowadays, advertisement targeting children is on the rise. Some people think that it has a negative impact and should be banned. Do you agree or disagree?

Smoking is a habit that claims many lives and is a great drain on health services. One way to combat smoking would be to make it illegal. What are the pros and cons of such a government policy? What alternative strategies can you suggest to combat smoking?