It is important for people to take risk, both in their professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disadvantages?

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Some

people

Use synonyms

think that taking risks in their careers and personal lives is crucial. Considering good opportunities in one’s profession

as well as

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broadening one's friend circle in personal life, I think the pros of taking a bold decision outweigh the cons. On the one hand, audacious

people

Use synonyms

who make their career decisions out of adventure often reach the culmination of their success. Major decisions,

such

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as dropping out of college for a bigger aim are considered heroes.

For example

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, Elon Musk, the owner of Tesla, took a major decision like leaving academic study for his imbibition, which now makes him the world’s richest person. If he had not taken that decision, he may have been looking for a job in the present day.

In addition

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, decisions like switching jobs are

also

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beneficial for a career.

For instance

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, a survey conducted by Tehran University says that

people

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who switch jobs frequently have a higher promotion rate than those with fixed jobs.

Secondly

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, a person who is willing to take a risk to make more friends is generally less stressed. Generally, most

people

Use synonyms

are very adamant about communicating with others because of their comfort zone. But extroverts always find a way to make good friends that gives them enough space to share their thoughts and feelings. It helps them become rejuvenated.

For example

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, doctors suggest that stressed

people

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should make more friends and share their thoughts with others to reduce their stress.

To conclude

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although

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taking risks might have some disadvantages, I believe the benefits are far greater and

also

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play a vital role in our lives and

this

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factor lets

people

Use synonyms

be successful in their lives.

Submitted by jonahid.stu20ju on Fri Aug 18 2023

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10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

276 words

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