IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Some people think that public libraries are necessary while others believe that nowadays public libraries are no longer important. What is your opinion?

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Public libraries are one of the important places for
people
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 of all age groups across the globe.
However
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,
due to
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 the
necessary
Replace the word
necessity
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 of
libraries
Add a comma
libraries,
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 today are less used by society.
While
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,
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apply
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 I agree with
this
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 notion and the same will be discussed in the subsequent paragraphs.
Firstly
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, in
this
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modernization
Add a comma
modernization,
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 almost every in all age groups is using a smartphone which has the internet inside it.
In addition
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, technology is now developing more easily for
people
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 to use.
For instance
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,
people
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 especially students can find tons of
books
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or
Correct word choice
apply
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also
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 called electronic
books
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 or e-
books
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 by using the internet on their phones by typing the title of the book they want to learn. Students
also
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 can read in unspecific places they want not only in the
library
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.
Furthermore
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, some public
library
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 has several authorities to
make
Verb problem
apply
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limit
books
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 for
people
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 to borrow and return the
books
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 within specific days.
For example
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, if the
library
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 only has one copy of
book
Correct article usage
a book
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,
so
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apply
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the
library
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 needs to reduce the timespan for borrowing by
maximum
Correct article usage
a maximum
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one
Change preposition
of one
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 week each. Because they want to make sure every
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people
Fix the agreement mistake
person
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have
Correct subject-verb agreement
has
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 a chance to read
this
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 book.
In contrast
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, ebooks can be downloaded and read with no limited time for using the
books
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.
Also
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, some ebooks have particular websites to help readers get more explanation of what they read. In conclusion, modernization has an effect on the number of
people
Use synonyms
 who come to public libraries.
Moreover
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, kids and teenagers need additional insight for their education and research because almost all of these criteria ages have smartphones or laptops for each person.

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coherence cohesion
The introduction lacks a clear thesis statement and a proper outline of the subsequent paragraphs.
task achievement
The main points lack clear and relevant support, and the examples provided are not effectively related to the argument.
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