Some people think that hard working and determination are the key factors for being successful in the life, other people feel that other factors are important. Discuss both sides, what is your opinion?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
some individuals may believe that the only reason for being
succussful
Correct your spelling
successful
is striving
while
Linking Words
others may opine that other features may be needed. In
this
Linking Words
essay
Add a comma
,essay
show examples
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
intend to
analiyze
Correct your spelling
analyse
both views.
However
Linking Words
,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
agree with the latter idea. on the one hand, proponents of
endeavoring
Change the spelling
endeavouring
show examples
may believe that all
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
things are reachable through the strong determination for achieving them. they believe people may not need
other factor
Change the wording
another factor
other factors
show examples
such
Linking Words
as wealth or
intellengence
Correct your spelling
intelligence
in order to make dreams come true which means that they have not any limitation to progress except the quantity of their
attempt
Fix the agreement mistake
attempts
show examples
. to
exepmlify
Correct your spelling
exemplify
, they retell the story of
Correct article usage
the turtle
show examples
turtle
Capitalize word
Turtle
show examples
and
rabit
Correct your spelling
Rabbit
.
rabit
Correct your spelling
Rabbit
was a
fast paced
Add a hyphen
fast-paced
show examples
animal and
turtle
Correct article usage
the turtle
show examples
was far
more
Change the word
apply
show examples
slower than
rabbit
Add an article
a rabbit
the rabbit
show examples
.
However
Linking Words
, in their race turtle could defeat
rabbit
Correct article usage
the rabbit
show examples
only because of his
willing
Replace the word
willingness
show examples
.
on the other hand
Linking Words
, the opponents may argue that we live in
inequity
Correct article usage
an inequity
show examples
world
which
Change preposition
in which
show examples
necessarly
Correct your spelling
necessarily
efforting and craving to reach something would not guarantee success. in
this
Linking Words
competitive era
other factor
Change the wording
another factor
other factors
show examples
such
Linking Words
as wealth status,
intellegence
Correct your spelling
intelligence
and other instinct features
which
Change preposition
in which
show examples
people have no
interfere
Replace the word
interference
show examples
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
, can be prominent.
for instance
Linking Words
, we have seen that despite the fact that some individuals labouring to the
extend
Replace the word
extent
show examples
of death
but
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
, they cannot provide even mediocre facilities for their vita.
moreover
Linking Words
, it is a renowned quote that
say
Change the verb form
says
show examples
money multiples money.
to sum up
Linking Words
,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
reiterate that as we live in
today
Change noun form
today's
show examples
world, higher
qualification
Fix the agreement mistake
qualifications
show examples
are needed in order to guarantee
peoples'
Change noun form
people's
show examples
success and contrary to past determination and striving is not sufficient.
Submitted by majidimehrsa on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • perseverance
  • skill development
  • overcoming obstacles
  • social connections
  • economic background
  • grit
  • entrepreneurs
  • existing connections
  • industries
  • career paths
  • balanced perspective
What to do next:
Look at other essays: