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Band 5.5

Some people think that hard working and determination are the key factors for being successful in the life, other people feel that other factors are important. Discuss both sides, what is your opinion?

#people #determination #factors #life
some individuals may believe that the only reason for being
succussful
Correct your spelling
successful
 is striving
while
 others may opine that other features may be needed. In
this
essay
Add a comma
,essay
show examples
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 intend to
analiyze
Correct your spelling
analyse
 both views.
However
,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 agree with the latter idea. on the one hand, proponents of
endeavoring
Change the spelling
endeavouring
show examples
 may believe that all
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
things are reachable through the strong determination for achieving them. they believe people may not need
other factor
Change the wording
another factor
other factors
show examples
such
 as wealth or
intellengence
Correct your spelling
intelligence
 in order to make dreams come true which means that they have not any limitation to progress except the quantity of their
attempt
Fix the agreement mistake
attempts
show examples
. to
exepmlify
Correct your spelling
exemplify
, they retell the story of
Correct article usage
the turtle
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turtle
Capitalize word
Turtle
show examples
 and
rabit
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Rabbit
.
rabit
Correct your spelling
Rabbit
 was a
fast paced
Add a hyphen
fast-paced
show examples
 animal and
turtle
Correct article usage
the turtle
show examples
 was far
more
Change the word
apply
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slower than
rabbit
Add an article
a rabbit
the rabbit
show examples
.
However
, in their race turtle could defeat
rabbit
Correct article usage
the rabbit
show examples
 only because of his
willing
Replace the word
willingness
show examples
.
on the other hand
, the opponents may argue that we live in
inequity
Correct article usage
an inequity
show examples
 world
which
Change preposition
in which
show examples
necessarly
Correct your spelling
necessarily
 efforting and craving to reach something would not guarantee success. in
this
 competitive era
other factor
Change the wording
another factor
other factors
show examples
such
 as wealth status,
intellegence
Correct your spelling
intelligence
 and other instinct features
which
Change preposition
in which
show examples
 people have no
interfere
Replace the word
interference
show examples
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
, can be prominent.
for instance
, we have seen that despite the fact that some individuals labouring to the
extend
Replace the word
extent
show examples
 of death
but
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
, they cannot provide even mediocre facilities for their vita.
moreover
, it is a renowned quote that
say
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says
show examples
 money multiples money.
to sum up
,
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 reiterate that as we live in
today
Change noun form
today's
show examples
 world, higher
qualification
Fix the agreement mistake
qualifications
show examples
 are needed in order to guarantee
peoples'
Change noun form
people's
show examples
 success and contrary to past determination and striving is not sufficient.
Submitted by majidimehrsa on

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