You recently received a letter from a friend asking for advice about whether to go to college or to try to get a job. You think he/she should get a job. Write a letter to this friend. In your letter •say why he/she would not enjoy going to college •explain why getting a job is a good idea for him/her •suggest types of job that would be suitable for him/her

#friend #advice #college #job #•say #•explain #idea #•suggest

Dear Jay, hope

this

letter finds you in

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radiant health and best of the spirits. I am writing

this

letter with regard to a suggestion for you whether to start

the

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university or to find a job.

To begin

with,I got to know that you have passed the central board exams and you are in dilemma about joining a college or work.

Firstly

,I am in favour of the job because you need some time to relax

as well as

decide your career stream.

Moreover

,If you start an employment,you will get time to think and research about your future goals.Since

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you do not have to work more than 5-6 hours a day, you can get explore different courses for

further

studies.

Besides

this

,you have to target the specific white collar job,which can not give you more workload and you will get enough time to work on yourself.

Furthermore

,you can apply for jobs in

the

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medical stores, restaurants and as a receptionist.These are the areas,where they can hire students without prior experience. I hope you understand my opinion

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this

matter.Please feel free to reach

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out anytime for

further

information. yours sincerely, Parthkumar

Submitted by pp6859 on Thu Jun 13 2024

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grammar

Try to avoid minor grammatical errors such as missing articles (e.g., 'in a dilemma' instead of 'in dilemma') to improve clarity and professionalism.

coherence cohesion

Ensure each paragraph addresses a single idea more clearly to make the letter more cohesive.

task achievement

Your letter responds thoroughly to the task, addressing the reasons for not enjoying college, the benefits of getting a job, and suitable job suggestions.

writing tone

Your tone is appropriate and friendly, which suits a letter to a friend seeking advice.

greeting and closing

You included a proper greeting and a suitable closing, which enhances the overall structure of the letter.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
6Grammar mistakes
 

7 paragraphs

190 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

theoretical nature
real-world experience
practical experience
professional network
financial independence
dynamic
on-the-job learning
creative industries
customer service
sectors
suitable

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

In many countries, the number of animals and plants is declining. Why do you think this is happening? How can this issue be solved?

In some places old age is value, while in other cultures youth is considered more important. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Review the book "In Valeria's shoes" by Elisabeth Benavent.

Some people believe that it is best to accept a bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory jobs or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. Discuss both these views and give your opinion.

Many manufactured food and drinks product contain high level of sugars which causes many health problems. Sugary product should be made more expensive to encourage people to consume less sugar. Do you agree or disagree?