In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words.

#cultures #children #message

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Nowadays,

children

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want everything to come true.

Moreover

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, they don'

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like to wait until the thing comes to them, in

this

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,world it's not that easy to get something we want.

Children

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or everyone must try hard to arrive at their dreams. But, it has certain drawbacks too.

However

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this

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essay will examine the advantage and disadvantages of

children

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can own anything that they want if they are trying hard. The two main advantages of

children

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owning things if they try hard.

Firstly

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, feeling happy about what they did to get the thing and

secondly

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, it helps in future when the child grows up so he or she can control him/herself with no helps from others.

For example

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, my small brother saved up money for approximately 2 years to buy his dream doll. After that, he didn'

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believe what he did.

Finally

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, that

show

Correct subject-verb agreement

shows

show examples

how life is going and how things are hard to have it.

However

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, achieving everything might have a few disadvantages. what I mean is

children

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that could move because of paralysis and

children

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that live in a weak or poor region absolutely couldn'

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do anything to have the things they want it.

For instance

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, my small cousin lives in a small poor country and he can'

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move his legs because of a bike accident.

Consequently

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, it's difficult for my cousin to own whatever he wants.

To conclude

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, achieving everything might have a few effects and disadvantages.

Besides

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, there are more nice advantages to owning everything by trying hard enough.

Submitted by hamoudisayyah on Sat Aug 19 2023

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11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

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Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

253 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

achieve
try hard
positive mindset
self-belief
motivates
ambitious goals
resilience
determination
confidence
self-esteem
growth mindset
unrealistic expectations
disappointment
failure
effort
hard work
seek support
individual differences
abilities
capabilities

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