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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

The visuals give information about the number of hours students spent preparing for an admission test for an Asian university and their subsequent performance in that test. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

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The pie chart and the bar chart show the relationship between the grade the learner achieved in the
exam
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 for admission to an Asian university and the percentage of the number of
hours
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students
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 use to prepare for that
exam
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. In general,
students
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 who study for the university entrance
exam
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 for 51 to 100
hours
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 tend to score higher than those who study for shorter periods of time.
While
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,
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apply
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 the highest scores are achieved by
students
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 who study for 101 to 125
hours
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. There is a positive correlation between the number of
hours
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 spent studying for the admission exams and the scores achieved by the examinees in the
exam
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.
Firstly
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,
Students
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 reached a top score of 81 out of a possible 100 points. The
students
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 who achieved
this
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 grade dedicated 101 to 125
hours
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 to studying for the
exam
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, making up 19% of all
students
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.
However
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, Only 11% of workers put in more than 126
hours
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 of work, but they scored lower with about 79 correct answers.
Moreover
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, 47% of
students
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 took between 51 to 100
hours
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 to prepare for the admission
exam
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, which was the highest percentage, and they got about 72 of the right answers normally.
In addition
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, 15% of
students
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 who worked for 26 to 50
hours
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 answered 59 questions correctly, which is better than those who worked for less than 25
hours
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 and only answered 30 questions correctly.

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Structure and Clarity
Make sure to introduce both visuals separately at the beginning since it provides a clear context before delving into the details. This helps the reader understand what each chart represents without confusion.
Task Response
Include a brief overview or summary of main trends, differences or stages in the initial paragraphs to give a clear picture of the overall data before diving into specifics.
Language Variation
Use a variety of sentence structures and vocabulary to describe trends and data accurately. While your description is quite clear, greater linguistic range could enhance the expressiveness of your report.
Comparative Language Use
While comparing data, try to use comparative adjectives and adverbs (more, less, higher, lower) and structures (compared to, in comparison with) to make the contrasts more apparent and your report smoother.
Conclusion
Conclude your essay by summarising the main trends observed without adding new information. This provides a satisfying closure to your analysis.
Data Interpretation
You have effectively illustrated the correlation between study hours and exam scores, highlighting key trends with specific data points.
Structure
The structure of your report, with clear separation between different sections, helps in maintaining a logical flow and coherence throughout.
Detail Use
Providing specific percentages and scores adds authority and preciseness to your analyses, making your arguments more convincing.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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