IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4.5

Some people think cities are the best place to live. Others people prefer to live in the countryside. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #cities #place #countryside
It is
Correct pronoun usage
Is
show examples
 considered that cities are the perfect areas to live,
while
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
others
who
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
believed that
live
Wrong verb form
living
show examples
 in the countryside is better. In my opinion, living inner-city will have more high-tech
equipments
Change the wording
equipment
types of equipment
pieces of equipment
show examples
 and living in the rural areas is suitable for
people
 who want to let
them
Change the pronoun
their
show examples
 hair down. On the one hand, living in the city will have more opportunities to get a well-paid job
due to
 a lot of companies, factories, and
manufactures
Replace the word
manufacturers
show examples
 there,
that
Correct pronoun usage
which
show examples
 can attract a large number of young adults from rural
area
Fix the agreement mistake
areas
show examples
.
People
 tend to live in
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 space that can ensure they will have a sophisticated
life
.
Besides
,
Correct article usage
the inner-city
show examples
inner-city
Correct your spelling
inner city
show examples
 will have much higher living costs and the levels of crime and unemployment are higher too. That
mean
Change the verb form
means
show examples
 you need to
poised
Add a missing verb
be poised
show examples
 on the brink of
thief
Add an article
the thief
a thief
show examples
 and become
an
Change the article
a
show examples
 circumspect person whenever you want to hang out.
On the other hand
, it is a certitude to believe that
people
 can live a
serenity
Replace the word
serene
show examples
life
 if they move house to the countryside. The main reason is
humor
Change the spelling
humour
show examples
 can experience
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
lower living costs and the pace of
life
 is slower
that
Correct word choice
so that
show examples
 they can enjoy the value
living
Change preposition
of living
show examples
.
Furthermore
, they can have some prerogative that nowhere
is have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
 like folksy repast, leave the flurried
life style
Correct your spelling
lifestyle
show examples
 and admire the natural landscapes. After taking the essay into
considerations
Fix the agreement mistake
consideration
show examples
, I am convinced that living in the city will have more capitalization for me to develop myself to the fullest.
Although
 some notion of
people
 that
city
Correct article usage
the city
show examples
 is
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 hustle and bustle place, I concur that if I want to become stronger, I need to come to terms with the
difficult
Replace the word
difficulties
show examples
 and
accepting
Replace the word
acceptance
show examples
 in my
life
. I believed that the hasty lifestyle is a driving force behind me to try my best.
Submitted by [email protected] on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: