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Band 4

Individuals can do nothing to improve the environment; only governments and large companies can make a difference.

#individuals #environment #governments #companies #difference
There is no doubt that nowadays our
environment
need
Change the verb form
needs
show examples
 to be improved. The question is do
individuals
 made a change to their
environment
? In
this
essay
Add a comma
,essay
show examples
 I am going to discuss my view and draw my personal conclusion. In terms of disadvantages,
individuals
depending
Wrong verb form
depend
show examples
 only on
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
 and large
companies
 to make the
environment
 be
more
Change the word
apply
show examples
better. The main reason given to support
this
 claim is that we see huge improvements from
government
Add an article
the government
show examples
 every year but
individuals
 are only setting without any help from them. To illustrate,
government
Add an article
the government
show examples
 has successfully linked
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
water to the
inhabitants
Change to a genitive case
inhabitant's
inhabitants'
show examples
 homes,
also
 they
has
Change the verb form
have
show examples
 built new free houses for people who are poor and can’t pay
a good houses
Correct the article-noun agreement
a good house
good houses
show examples
 for them.
However
,
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
 and large
companies
 are the
once
Correct your spelling
ones
show examples
 who responsible for their country and
and
Remove the redundancy
apply
show examples
it is development. In
other word
Change the wording
another word
other words
show examples
, the full responsibility is on
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
 and large
companies
 because they own
this
environment
 as well.
For instance
,one of the main important
point
Change to a plural noun
points
show examples
 is providing schools for inhabitants to be sure that everyone has got the right
of
Change preposition
to
show examples
 education.
In
Change preposition
On
show examples
other
Correct article usage
the other
show examples
 hand,
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
 and large
companies
 are able to improve our
environment
 because they have got sufficient money despite
individuals
. To make it clear,large
companies
 gain significant profits every year as
government
Add an article
the government
show examples
 has the money too ,except
individuals
 they’ve only got their salaries which
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
 less than
government
 own .
Finally
,we could say that inhabitants are
important
Correct article usage
an important
show examples
 part
from
Change preposition
of
show examples
this
 country. So ,
government
 and large
companies
 must ensure that steps are taken to prevent
this
 phenomenon from deteriorating
further
.
Submitted by m on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • environmental awareness
  • sustainable practices
  • renewable energy
  • carbon footprint
  • waste reduction
  • conservation
  • ecosystem
  • pollution
  • climate change
  • responsibility
  • leadership
  • legislation
  • investment
  • collaboration
  • systemic change
What to do next:
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