IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Nowadays an increasing number of people change their careers during their work life period. What are the reasons behind this trend? Is it a generally positive or negative development?

#people #change #careers #work #life #period #trend #development
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Having a successful career is very crucial for survival in
this
 competitive world. The trend of changing
job
 professions is becoming popular among
people
. High
compeition
Correct your spelling
competition
 in
job
Add an article
the job
show examples
 market and high income are some of the causes.
This
 essay will discuss how changing
career
Fix the agreement mistake
careers
show examples
 is advantageous for society. To start with, high
compeition
Correct your spelling
competition
 for one
job
 profession makes
people
to
Change the verb form
apply
show examples
find
new
Add an article
a new
show examples
 field. As several
people
 learn one profession
due to
 the high demand at that particular period resulting in lesser
postion
Correct your spelling
position
portion
 but more candidates and all
this
 leads to unemployment.
For example
, in the
last
decade
Add a comma
,decade
show examples
 the demand
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
 computer
engineer
Fix the agreement mistake
engineers
show examples
 was at
peak
Correct pronoun usage
its peak
show examples
, but now many of them are jobless.
Moreover
, changing to
new
Add an article
a new
show examples
job
 can be promising for high income. If an individual change his/ her
job
 as per the demand
then
 there is
high
Add an article
a high
show examples
 chance that the salary will be way
more high
Replace the words
higher
show examples
 than the
expecations
Correct your spelling
expectations
 he or she has. The appeal of Data
analyst
Fix the agreement mistake
analysts
show examples
for example
 is rising
everyday
Replace the word
every day
show examples
 and
an
Correct article usage
the
show examples
avergae
Correct your spelling
average
 salary a fresher analyst is getting is between half a thousand dollars. Switching
profession
Fix the agreement mistake
professions
show examples
 will put a positive impact on the economy of a nation.
This
 is simply
beacuse
Correct your spelling
because
, the
people
 will going to have their past experience and learning a new skill will make them more right candidates with high income, by that they can improve their living standard and all these factors will contribute
a
Change preposition
to a
show examples
country's healthy economy. In conclusion, numerous candidate for one
job
 and to earn more money switching
job
Fix the agreement mistake
jobs
show examples
 provides a wonderful alternative for a worker. With
good
Correct article usage
a good
show examples
paycheck
Add a comma
,paycheck
show examples
 a person can spend more which
all
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
will help to increase the economy of a country.
Submitted by akankasha980 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: