IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5

Some people argue that all experimentation on animals is bad and should be outlawed. However, others believe that important scientific discoveries can be made from animal experiments. Can experimentation on animals be justified? Are there any alternatives?

#people #experimentation #animals #discoveries #experiments #alternatives
Most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
scientist
Fix the agreement mistake
scientists
show examples
anmals
Correct your spelling
animals
 take their
experiments
 but some
people
 do not
agree
Add the preposition
onagree
toagree
withagree
show examples
this
 work.because most of the
animals
 are dead.But some
people
 think there are
number
Change the article
a number
the number
show examples
 of
invation
Correct your spelling
innovation
 can be made from
animals
 .
therefore
animals
 are very important.I
wil
Correct your spelling
will
 discuss both views and I give my opinion.
To begin
 with,Animal is
most
Add an article
a most
the most
show examples
 important combination in our
worls
Correct your spelling
world
.
so
Capitalize word
So
show examples
 many
animals
close
Add a missing verb
are close
show examples
 to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
human .
such
 as dog ,monkey ,elephants and other wild
animals
.In past ,more work did have by
animals
.nowadays
animals
use
 for some
experiment
 .
such
 as vaccination and some tablets or some
scietific
Correct your spelling
scientific
works
Fix the agreement mistake
work
show examples
.rat and monkey is
main
Change the article
the main
show examples
 animal in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
scientific
experiments
.
In addition
 ,more
people
 argue with
scientist
Fix the agreement mistake
scientists
show examples
 because
people
 do not like to
use
animals
 for their
experiment
Fix the agreement mistake
experiments
show examples
.There are number of
animals
 are dying out because of the
experiment
 .so some
people
Correct your spelling
argued
argueed
Correct your spelling
argue
On the other hand
 ,some
people
 think
animals
 are important for
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
experiments
an experiment
show examples
experiments
 because so many
experiment
 successes begin with
animals
 and some scientific discoveries can be made from
anmals
Correct your spelling
animals
animal
experiments
 .For instant ,19 covid pandamic.,
china
Capitalize word
China
show examples
,Japan and
American
Correct article usage
the American
show examples
 vaccination test for
use
animals
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
was
Change the verb form
were
show examples
 successful in
the
Change the article
apply
show examples
2021.more countries
their
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
experiment
 for
use
animals
 because it is easy and
cost
Add an article
the cost
show examples
 is less
as well as
 protect
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
humans.
Then
animals
use
 for some innovations.
subsequently
 ,we can
use
alternative
Fix the agreement mistake
alternatives
show examples
instead
animals
 . Nowadays technology is improving in our world.I think we can
serch
Correct your spelling
search
 some product or plants
instead
animals
 . But sometimes it is not
best
Correct article usage
the best
show examples
 one but we can reduce the
use
animals
Change preposition
of animals
show examples
fot
Correct your spelling
for
experiment
Fix the agreement mistake
experiments
show examples
. In conclusion ,I will have discussed ,
first
Correct article usage
the first
show examples
 and second paragraphs,Some
people
 argue that all experimentation on
animals
 is bad and should be outlawed.
However
, others believe that important scientific discoveries can be made from animal
experiments
.I believe that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
we can
use
 alternatives
instead
animals
.
Submitted by heshanij9 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • scientific breakthroughs
  • ethical concerns
  • alternatives
  • animal testing
  • moral implications
  • ethical considerations
  • vivisection
  • research methods
  • ethical dilemmas
  • animal welfare
What to do next:
Look at other essays: