IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

Nowadays more and more young people hold the important position in the government. Some people think that it is good thing while others argue that it is not suitable. Discuss both these and give your opinions

#people #position #government
In recent years more youngsters are seeing holding high positions in state sectors ,some experts berthing is a good idea
while
 others don't see it as a good thing.
This
 essay will talk about both sides and give my opinion .
To begin
 with, having young people included in the government brings much-needed change and diversity. Younger individuals often have a better understanding of modern issues and can offer new solutions to longstanding problems. They may
also
 be more in touch with the concerns and aspirations of the younger population, which can lead to policies that better address their needs.
Furthermore
, the youth population tend to be more adaptable and open-minded, which can be valuable.
For instance
,technology and social media, allow them to connect with citizens and engage them in the political process.
This
 can lead to increased transparency and accountability in government.
On the other hand
, the public thinks that youngsters lack the necessary experience and knowledge to effectively govern. They suggest that years of experience in politics and public service are crucial for understanding the complexities of governance and making informed decisions. They worry that young politicians may be easily swayed by popular opinion or lack the ability to navigate complex political landscapes.
Additionally
, critics argue that young people may be more idealistic and less willing to compromise, which could hinder effective governance. They believe that experienced politicians have a better understanding of how to navigate the intricacies of bureaucracy and build relationships with other leaders, both domestically and internationally. In my opinion, I think the inclusion of young people in government positions can bring numerous benefits. Their fresh perspectives and innovative ideas can inject new energy into politics, leading to more responsive and inclusive policies,even though
experience
Add an article
the experience
show examples
 is
also
 important
Submitted by boadimaxwell48 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: