Government investment in the arts, such as music and theatre, is a waste of money. Governments must invest this money in public services instead. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

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It is widely argued that governments must invest
money
in public facilities and services
instead
of spending it on the arts like music and theatre.
Although
a significant number of individuals support the logical reasons which will be identified in
this
academic essay. On one hand, some people are against
this
subject for their own justifications and they consider that the arts have an important feature in society.
To begin
with, young people desire to show their interests and talents, but they do not have an adequate budget to buy what they want like musical instruments and to conduct a musical concert on a public stage,
for
example
, so they need
money
from big governmental institutions to be an official sponsor and adopt them. The other
reason
is that these entertaining issues create a variety of jobs, so, it is not a waste of
money
. To explain, actors earn a salary and if
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
has
been
Wrong verb form
are
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ignored these careers, the theatre will be diminished.
On the other hand
, I deem that governmental organizations must concentrate on society development in various fields is essential. The most significant and clear
reason
that supports my agreement is that they must take care of the health sector.
For
example
, patients suffer from a lack of devices
as well as
provide comfortable rooms. Purchasing advanced medical machines, especially, in public hospitals is more important than building theatres. Another
reason
is that sick people have been sleeping in hospitals for a long time because of having serious diseases. They require a spacious room to feel good and healthy atmosphere. These issues related to healthcare must be taken seriously. The other key
reason
that makes me agree with
this
point is that remote regions have a shortage of necessary facilities like water supply and electricity, so,
instead
of wasting
money
on music
for
example
which is not necessary, these poor districts require a supportive hand from government to provide the required services.
Thus
,
this
subject bears plenty of positive aspects that I fully support
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
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.
Finally
, a common
reason
is the community’s claim to construct and repair infrastructure to avoid serious problems.
For
example
, destructive natural phenomena damage streets and buildings so, authorities have to be ready in any emergency because they are responsible
to fix
Change preposition
for fixing
show examples
damaged streets and destroyed building to protect their citizens. In brief, measures should be implemented to reduce the negative side effects of neglecting important elements. In conclusion, I strongly believe that governments must be aware to have a clear version to make their nation live healthily and safely, so the health sector, the education sector and infrastructure take priority.
In addition
, the advantages of
this
topic outweigh its disadvantages.
Submitted by memamema292 on

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task response
Provide a clear position and fully address the prompt for a complete response.
coherence and cohesion
Organize the essay with a clear introduction, well-connected body paragraphs, and a conclusive ending.
lexical resource
Use a wider range of vocabulary and expressions to enhance the overall lexical resource.
grammatical range
Pay attention to sentence structure, use a variety of complex structures, and minimize grammatical errors.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • cultural enrichment
  • expression of creativity
  • promote diversity
  • enhance social cohesion
  • boost tourism
  • job creation
  • stimulate economic growth
  • improve quality of life
  • essential services
  • maintenance and development
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