Some say that music, art and drama are as important as other school subjects, especially at the primary level. Do you agree or disagree?

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Certainly, some feel that
art
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-related
subjects
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are as crucial as other important
subjects
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, especially in elementary
school
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. In
this
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essay, I will explain why I tend to agree with
this
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view. I concede that there are reasons why
school
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subjects
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such
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as math, science and language are more important than others, and perhaps the most obvious reason is that they are more aligned with future jobs in the modern world. If pupils spend most of their time studying these major
subjects
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, they may well perform better in the same fields, and
this
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enables them to attain a related job
such
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as IT programmer, accountants and is potentially absolutely beneficial.
For example
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, my cousin Lily, who used to focus on learning math at primary
school
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, gained a master’s degree in computer science, and
this
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ultimately allows her to find a lucrative job in an IT company.
However
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, I believe that non-science
subjects
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are as crucial as compulsory
subjects
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. One compelling reason is
music
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,
art
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and drama can help children develop creative thinking at an early age. When they study
music
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and
art
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, they can express themselves without words, in turn enabling them to strengthen their abilities of imagination and inspiration. What
this
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does is make it incredibly vital. Another reason is that learning
music
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and
art
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may well benefit children’s mental health and lead to a positive outlook in life. Primary schools in China,
for instance
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, design their curriculum with a balance of
art
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and science
subjects
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. As
such
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, students have a comprehensive development in their
overall
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well-being, which is why
subjects
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like
music
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and
art
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are as important as other
subjects
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, especially for elementary
school
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students.
Overall
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, I totally agree that
music
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,
art
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and drama are as important as other important
subjects
Use synonyms
, especially at the primary level.
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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • holistic development
  • fostering
  • emotional intelligence
  • problem-solving skills
  • cultural awareness
  • curriculum
  • engaging
  • memorable
  • nurture
  • talents
  • core subjects
  • academic
  • professional success
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