Many people are now opting to provide technology companies with their personal data in exchange for access to software. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?

Certainly, nowadays many
people
tend to provide high-tech
companies
with their personal information to exchange access to
software
. In
this
essay, I will explain why I think the negative effects outweigh the positive ones. I concede that there are several reasons why
people
choose to share their private
data
with technology
companies
in order to use their
software
and perhaps the most obvious one is
this
software
makes their life easier and more effective. If
people
use free
software
to make connections with their colleagues and loved ones, it is much easier and faster than the ways they have been used before
such
as home telephones and telegrams and is potentially absolutely beneficial.
For example
, WeChat, one of the most popular social networking apps in China, has a tremendous number of users, enabling individuals to interact with each other just by sending instant messages and uploading photos, and
this
ultimately leads to a more harmonious relationship among
people
.
However
, I believe that the disadvantages of
this
trend outnumber the advantages. One of the most important reasons is that these
companies
can sell users’
data
to third
companies
for advertisement needs. When they collect
people
’s likes and dislikes, they invariably understand their interests and desires, in turn creating artificial needs to encourage individuals to consume their products, which is why we should not expose our personal
data
to these kinds of
companies
. Taobao,
for instance
, buys numerous information from
data
-collecting
companies
. As
such
it advertises its commodities by pop-up window advertisement to targeted customers, which means it can reach the right person and attain great success of sales results. In conclusion, I feel that,
although
there are some benefits of exchanging personal
data
to
Change preposition
with
show examples
technology
companies
for access to their
software
, the drawbacks are more vital for the reasons above.
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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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