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The two graphs below show the percentage of smokers and the consumption of alcohol in lites in selected countries, for the period 1960 - 2000. 3959 arse the information by choosing and reporting the key features, and make any relevant comparisons.

The two graphs below show the percentage of smokers and the consumption of alcohol in lites in selected countries, for the period 1960 - 2000. 3959 arse the information by choosing and reporting the key features, and make any relevant comparisons.
#two #graphs #show #percentage #smokers #consumption #alcohol #lites #countries #period #arse #information #features #comparisons
The line graph
illustrate
Change the verb form
illustrates
show examples
 the percentage of alcohol and
smokers
Replace the word
smoking
show examples
 consumption between 1960 to 2000 in different countries. In
general
Add a comma
,general
show examples
 the amount of smokers is declining during
this
 period . The highest being Holland with 60 % in 1960 remaining stable until 1970 before a sharp decline of 20 %.
In
addition
Add a comma
,addition
show examples
 Japan and USA had the lowest rate around 40 to 50% .
Thereafter
 ,continuously
deacreasing
Correct your spelling
decreasing
 approximately 40% for Japan and around 18% in
USA
Correct article usage
the USA
show examples
 in 2000. Turning towards the alcohol intake only a tiny fraction of the people are concerned in The United States with 7% increasing to 10 % in 1989 before a gradual fall in 2000 (8%).
Moreover
Add a comma
,Moreover
show examples
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
Holland
Add a comma
,Holland
show examples
 it is clearly seen a straight rise
12
Change preposition
of 12
show examples
% in 1980
then
 a small drop
nearly
Change preposition
of nearly
show examples
 10% .
However
Add a comma
,However
show examples
 Turkey has not
much
Add a missing verb
had much
show examples
 change throughout the years keeping a general trend 0 -2 %.
Overall
 Holland
is having
Wrong verb form
has
show examples
 a large proportion of customers for
the
Remove the article
apply
show examples
both goods . ‎<
This
 message was edited>
Submitted by addaragelal on

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Basic structure: Use less body paragraphs.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "percentage" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the eighth paragraph.
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